s: The following additional quatrains may be quoted:


s: Unasking have we come,--too late, too soon


s: Unasking from this plot of earth are sent.


s: Use half our lives in asking for the moon.


s: ("We all sorely complain," says Seneca, "of the shortness of


s: time, and yet have much more than we know what to do with. Our


s: lives are either spent in doing nothing at all or in doing


s: nothing to the purpose, or in doing nothing that we ought to do.


s: We are always complaining that our days are few, and acting as


s: So then your hand has guarded me! Be blessed,


s: And, if you like such reading, read, I pray,


s: Through Moses' book, or credit them who say


s: Some day, some day the potter shall return


s: An earth which I would not refuse to take,


s: Or such unpleasant earth as you would spurn?


s: Then out of that--men swear with godly skill--


s: Which they can love and break, if so they will.


s: And from a resting-place you may be hurled


s: And from a score of countries may be thrust--


s: Poor brother, you the freeman of the dust,


s: Like any slave are flung about the world.


s: As you sit so, in the firelight, your hand is the color of


s: In it, as in a microcosm, the vast and shadowy Orient


s: You are a large man, yet it is small and narrow, like the


s: hand of a woman and the paw of a chimpanzee.


s: It is supple and boneless as the hands wrought in pigment


s: by a fashionable portrait painter. The tapering


s: Between them burns a scented cigarette. You poise it


s: with infinite daintiness, like a woman under the


s: eyes of her lover. The long line of your curved


s: With a tiny brush it can feather lines of ineffable suggestion,


s: tool it can carve strange dreams in ivory and


s: With the same cold daintiness and skill it can devise


s: exquisite tortures, eternities of incredible pain,


s: And voluptuous is your hand, nice in its sense of touch.


s: Delicately it can caress a quivering skin, softly it can


s: glide over golden thighs.... Bilitis had not


s: In the firelight the smoke curls up fantastically from


s: the cigarette between your fingers which are the


s: They are filthy with the slimy filth of ages; like the


s: canals on which they float they give forth an evil


s: On soiled perches you sit, swung out on either side over


s: the scummy water--you who should be savage


s: and untamed, who should ride on the clean breath


s: of the sea and beat your pinions in the strong


s: Tamely you sit and willingly, ten wretches to a boat,


s: Around each throat is a ring of straw, a small ring, so


s: that you may swallow only small things, such as


s: Presently, when you reach the lake, you will dive.


s: At the word of your masters the parted waters will


s: close over you and in your ears will be the gurgling


s: Hungrily you will search in the darkened void, swiftly


s: you will pounce on the silver shadow....


s: Then you will rise again, bearing in your beak the


s: And your lousy lords, whose rings are upon your


s: throats, will take from you the catch, giving in its


s: place a puny wriggler which can pass the gates of


s: Yet willingly you sit, lurching and half asleep.


s: The boatmen shout one to another in nasal discords.


s: Lazily you preen your great wings, eagle wings,


s: Faugh! The sight of you sickens me, divers in inland


s: You sit, chanting the maxims of Confucius.


s: On your head is a domed cap of black satin and your


s: supple hands with their long nails are piously


s: Your voice, rising and falling in clear nasal monosyllables,


s: flows on steadily, monotonously, like the


s: flowing of water and the flowering of thought.


s: You are chanting, it seems, of the pious conduct of man


s: None the less the maxims of Confucius are venerable,


s: In a corner of the market-place he sits, his face the target


s: The sombre crowd about him is motionless. Behind


s: their faces no lamp burns; only their eyes glow


s: It alone is alive, is vibrant, moving bronze under a sun


s: The taut skin, like polished metal, shines along his


s: cheek and jaw. His eyes cut upward from a slender


s: nose, and his quick mouth moves sharply out


s: Artful are the gestures of his mouth, elaborate and


s: full of guile. When he draws back the bow of


s: his lips his face is like a mask of lacquer, set with


s: What strange tale lives in the gestures of his mouth?


s: Does a fox-maiden, bewitching, tiny-footed, lure a


s: scholar to his doom? Is an unfilial son tortured


s: of devils? Or does a decadent queen sport with


s: The faces of the people are wooden; only their eyes


s: The Second Well under Heaven lies at the foot of the


s: Perhaps the well is sacred because it is clean; or perhaps


s: At the bottom of the well are coppers and coins with


s: square holes in them, thrown thither by devout


s: hands. They gleam enticingly through the shallow


s: The people crowd about the well, leaning brown covetous


s: faces above the coping as my copper falls


s: Perhaps it will bring me luck, who knows?


s: Or perhaps, when it is quite dark, someone who is


s: In the cold darkness of eternity he sits, this god who


s: His rounded eyes are open on the whir of time, but


s: Blue is his graven face, and silver-blue his hands. His


s: eyebrows and his silken beard are scarlet as the


s: The yellow dragon on his rotting robes still rears itself


s: majestically, but thread by thread time eats its


s: For incense now he breathes the homely smell of rice


s: For priests the busy spiders hang festoons between his


s: fingers, and nest them in his yellow nails.


s: The veil that hid the awful face of godhead from the


s: too impetuous gaze of worshippers serves in decay


s: to hide from deity the living face of man,


s: The Bridge of the Eight Scholars spans the canal narrowly.


s: On the gray stone of its arch are carvings in low relief,


s: and the curve of its span is pleasing to the eye.


s: No one knows how old is the Bridge of the Eight


s: In our house-boat we pass under it. The boatman


s: with the rat-like face twists the long broken-backed


s: oar, churning the yellow water, and we creep forward


s: On the bridge the village is assembled. Foreign devils


s: The gold-brown faces are not unfriendly, merely curious.


s: They peer in rows over the rail with grunts


s: Tentatively, experimentally, as we pass they spit down


s: upon us. Not that they wish us ill, but it can be


s: The roof scrapes as we pass under the span of the


s: (The articles sold here are to be burned at funerals for


s: the use of the dead in the spirit world.)


s: The master of the shop is a pious man, in good odor


s: He is old and honorable and his white moustache


s: The shop behind him is a mimic world, a world


s: of pieties and shams--the valley of remembrance--the


s: Here on his shelves are ranged the splendor and the


s: panoply of life, silk in smooth gleaming rolls, silver


s: in ingots, carving and embroidery and jade, a


s: scarlet bearer-chair, a pipe for opium....


s: Whatever life has need of, it is here. Yet it is here in


s: sham, in effigy, in tortured compromise.


s: The dead have need of silk. Yet silk is dear, and


s: The rolls are paper.... Do not look too close.


s: The carvings, too, the bearer-chair, the jade--yes,


s: they are paper; and the shining ingots, they are


s: Yet they are made with skill and loving care!


s: And if the priest knows--surely he must know!--


s: when they are burned they'll serve the dead as


s: The master of the shop is a pious man. He has attained


s: much honor and his white moustache droops


s: "Such an one" he says "I burned for my own father.


s: And such an one my son will burn for me.


s: For I am old, and half my life already dwells among


s: And, as he speaks, behind him in the shop I feel the


s: presence of a hovering host, the myriads of the


s: immortal dead, the rulers of the spirit in this


s: For in this kingdom of the dead they who are living


s: cling with fevered hands to the torn fringes of the


s: mighty past. And if they fail a little, compromise....


s: The feet of my servant thump on the floor. _Thump,_


s: they go, and _thump_--dully, deformedly.


s: The instep has been broken upward into a bony cushion.


s: The big toe is pointed as an awl. The small


s: toes are folded under the cushioned instep. Only


s: The thing is white and bloodless with the pallor of


s: She smiles toothlessly and shows me how small are her


s: The room is not large, but it is heavily crowded, filled


s: with small tables, filled with many human bodies.


s: About the walls are paintings and banners in sharp


s: colors; above our heads hang innumerable gaudy


s: lanterns of wood and paper. We sit in furs,


s: The food passes endlessly, droll combinations in brown


s: gravies--roses, sugar, and lard--duck and


s: bamboo--lotus, chestnuts, and fish-eggs--an


s: They tempt curiosity; my chop-sticks are busy. The


s: The groom is invisible somewhere, but the bride


s: martyrs among us. She is clad in scarlet satin,


s: heavily embroidered with gold. On her head is


s: For weeks, I know, she has wept in protest.


s: The feast-mother leads her in to us with sacrificial


s: rites. Her eyes are closed, hidden behind her


s: curtain of strung beads; for three days she will


s: not open them. She has never seen the bridegroom.


s: At the feast she sits like her own effigy. She neither


s: Opposite her, across the narrow table, is a wall of


s: curious faces, lookers-on--children and half-grown


s: boys, beggars and what-not--the gleanings


s: To-night, when the bridegroom draws the scarlet curtains


s: Strange, formless memories out of books struggle upward


s: in my consciousness. This is the marriage


s: at Cana.... I am feasting with the Caliph


s: at Bagdad.... I am the wedding guest who


s: What shall be said of blood-brotherhood between man


s: Only a beggar, professionally maimed, I think._


s: Across the narrow street it lies, the street where little


s: It is rocking its body back and forth, back and forth,


s: Beside the body are stretched two naked stumps of


s: flesh, on one the remnant of a foot. The wounds


s: are not new wounds, but they are open and they


s: The Thing is whining, shrilly, hideously.


s: Already the sun is treacherous and a dull mugginess is


s: in the air. I note that winter clothes are shedding


s: In the market-place sits a coolie, expanding in the


s: He has opened his ragged upper garments and his


s: He is examining it minutely, occasionally picking at


s: something with the dainty hand of the Orient.


s: If he had ever seen a zoological garden I should say


s: As he has not, I dare say the taste is ingrained.


s: At all events it is going to be hot here.


s: About the city where I dwell, guarding it close, runs


s: It was not new I think when Arthur was a king, and


s: plumèd knights before a British wall made brave


s: clangor of trumpets, that Launcelot came forth.


s: It was not new I think, and now not it but chivalry is


s: Without, the wall is brick, with slots for firing, and it


s: drops straightway into the evil moat, where offal


s: Within, the wall is earth; it slants more gently down,


s: covered with grass and stubbly with cut weeds.


s: Below it in straw lairs the beggars herd, patiently


s: As I walk, lifted above the squalor and the dirt, the


s: timeless miracle of sunset mantles in the west,


s: And beauty moves immortal through the land.


s: And I walk quickly, praying in my heart that beauty


s: will defend me, will heal up the too great wounds


s: I will not look--to-night I will not look--where at


s: The boxes where the beggar children lie, unburied


s: I will not look again, for once I saw how one was


s: broken, torn by the sharp teeth of dogs. A little


s: tattered dress was there, and some crunched


s: I need not look. What can it help to look?


s: The tall pagoda, like a velvet flower, blossoms against


s: the sky; the Sacred Mountain fades, and in the


s: I will hold fast to beauty! Who am I, that I should


s: I will go down. I am too sorely hurt, here on the


s: I have no standard by which to appraise you; the outer


s: Your small plump body is closely clad in blue brocaded


s: satin. The fit is scrupulous, yet no woman's figure


s: is revealed. You are decorously shapeless.


s: Your satin trousers even are lined with fur.


s: Your hair is stiff and lustrous as polished ebony, bound


s: at the neck in an adamantine knot, in which dull


s: Your face is young and round and inscrutably alien.


s: Your complexion is exquisite, matte gold over-lying


s: Your nose is flat, the perfect nose of China.


s: The blank curtain of your upper lid droops sharply on


s: the iris, and when you smile the corners twinkle


s: They are alert and full of curiosity as the eyes of a


s: squirrel, and like the eyes of a squirrel they have


s: They are windows opening on a world as small as your


s: bound feet, a world of ignorances, and vacuities,


s: And yet your eyes are witchery. When you smile you


s: I cannot appraise you, yet strangely the sight of you


s: We met him in the runway called a street, between the


s: He looked still the same, but his French-cut tweeds,


s: his continental hat, and small round glasses were


s: About him we felt a troubled uncertainty.


s: He greeted us gladly. "It is good," he said in his


s: soft French, "to see my foreign friends again.


s: You find our city dirty I am sure. On every stone


s: How the people crowd! The street is choked. _No


s: jee ba_! Go away, curious ones! The ladies


s: No, my people are not clean. They do not understand,


s: ... Yes, I was studying in Bruges, studying


s: We, you know, love peace. I could not see....


s: "But China is very dirty.... Our priests are rascals,


s: "Is there, perhaps, a true religion somewhere? The


s: Behind his glasses his slant eyes were troubled.


s: It stands before my neighbor's door, between him and


s: the vegetable garden and the open toilet pots and


s: Not that he wishes to hide these things.


s: But China, you must understand, is full of evil spirits,


s: demons of the earth and air, foxes and _shui-mang_


s: devils, and only the priest knows what beside.


s: A man may at any moment be bewitched, so that his


s: silk-worms die and his children go blind and he


s: But Heaven has providentially decreed that these evil


s: spirits can travel only in a straight line. Around


s: So my neighbor has built a wall that runs before his


s: He cannot see his vegetable garden, and his toilet pots,


s: Space, and the twelve clean winds of heaven,


s: And this sharp exultation, like a cry, after the slow


s: This is Tai Shan, the beautiful, the most holy.


s: Below my feet the foot-hills nestle, brown with flecks


s: of green; and lower down the flat brown plain, the


s: floor of earth, stretches away to blue infinity.


s: Beside me in this airy space the temple roofs cut their


s: And one black bird circles above the void.


s: Space, and the twelve clean winds are here;


s: And with them broods eternity--a swift, white peace,


s: The rhythm ceases here. Time has no place. This


s: Here when Confucius came, a half a thousand years


s: before the Nazarene, he stepped, with me, thus


s: The stone beside us waxes old, the carven stone that


s: says: _On this spot once Confucius stood and


s: But I shall go down from this airy space, this swift


s: And time will close about me, and my soul stir to the


s: Yet, having known, life will not press so close, and


s: always I shall feel time ravel thin about me;


s: In the white windy presence of eternity.


s: He swaggers in green silk and his two coats are lined


s: with fur. Above his velvet shoes his trim, bound


s: In one slim hand--the ultimate punctilio--dangles


s: a bamboo cage, wherein a small brown bird sits


s: Mr. Chu smiles the benevolent smile of one who satisfies


s: The furnaces, the great steel furnaces, tremble and


s: glow; gigantic machinery clanks, and in living


s: iridescent streams the white-hot slag pours out.


s: This is to-morrow set in yesterday, the west imbedded


s: And you who walk beside me, picking your familiar way


s: between the dynamos, the cars, the piles of rails--


s: you too are of to-morrow, grafted with an alien


s: You wear the costume of the west, you speak my


s: tongue as one who knows; you talk casually of


s: You touch on Socialism, walk-outs, and the industrial


s: "How much do those poor coolies earn a day, who


s: "Eighteen coppers. Something less than eight cents


s: in your money. They are not badly paid. They


s: "And is it true that you've a Yâmen, a police judge,


s: "Yes, he attends to all small cases of disorder. For


s: larger crimes we pass the offender over to the


s: "Conditions" you explain as we sit later with a cup


s: of tea, "conditions here are difficult."


s: Your figure has grown lax, your voice a little weary.


s: You are fighting, I can see, upheld by that strange


s: Yet odds are heavy, and the Orient is in your blood.


s: "There are no skilled laborers" you say, "Among


s: It is like--like working in a nightmare, here in China.


s: The furnaces, the great steel furnaces, tremble and


s: glow, gigantic machinery clanks and in living


s: iridescent streams the white-hot slag pours out.


s: A beggar rots and grovels, clutching at my skirt with


s: leprous hands. A woman sits sorting hog-bristles;


s: It is spring and the warmth is highly favorable to fermentation.


s: At the corner of my street is an especially fragrant


s: reservoir. It is three feet in diameter, set flush


s: His silk skirt is gathered daintily about his waist, and


s: his rounded rear is suspended in mid-air over the


s: He gazes at me contemplatively as I pass with eyes in


s: which the philosophy of the ages has its dwelling.


s: I wonder whether he too feels the spring.


s: In all the city where I dwell two spaces only are wide


s: One is the compound about the great church of the


s: mission within the wall; the other is the courtyard


s: And two sounds there are, above the multitudinous crying


s: of the city, two sounds that recur as time recurs--the


s: Every hour of the day the mission bell strikes, clear,


s: And in the morning and in the evening the factory


s: whistle blows, shrill, provocative--telling surely


s: Now, when the mulberry trees are bare and the wintry


s: wind lifts the rags of the beggars, the day shift


s: at the factory is ten hours, and the night shift


s: They are divided one from the other by the whistle,


s: The mission and the factory are the West. What


s: And between them lies the Orient--struggling and


s: suffering, spawning and dying--but what it is


s: Yet there are two clean spaces in the city where I dwell,


s: the compound of the church within the wall, and


s: the courtyard of the factory beyond the wall.


s: It is something that in these two one can breathe.


s: The old one--he who has presided over the household


s: Before she burned him Mrs. Sung smeared his mouth


s: with sugar; so that doubtless the report will be


s: As she paid ten coppers for him he is handsomely


s: painted and should be highly efficacious.


s: So there is rejoicing in the house of Mrs. Sung.


s: Like the patter of rain on the crisp leaves of autumn


s: are the tiny footfalls of the fox-maidens.


s: On the fifth day of the fifth month the statesman Küh


s: Yuen drowned himself in the river Mih-lo.


s: Since then twenty-three centuries have passed, and the


s: Yet every year, on the fifth day of the fifth month,


s: the great Dragon Boats, gay with flags and gongs,


s: search diligently in the streams of the Empire


s: When Kang Yi had been long dead the Empress decreed


s: upon him posthumous decapitation, so that


s: he walks for ever disgraced among the shades.


s: While two ladies of the Imperial harem held before


s: him a screen of pink silk, and a P'in Concubine


s: knelt with his ink-slab, Li Po, who was very


s: drunk, wrote an impassioned poem to the moon.


s: O golden night, lit by the flame of seven stars, the


s: Like this frail and melancholy rain is the memory of


s: the Emperor Kuang-Hsü, and of his sufferings at


s: Yet under heaven was there found no one to avenge


s: Now he has mounted the Dragon and has visited the


s: Nine Springs. His betrayer sits upon the Dragon


s: Yet among the shades may he not take comfort from


s: When he had tasted in a dream of the Ten Courts of


s: Purgatory, Doctor Tsêng was humbled in spirit,


s: and passed his life in piety among the foot-hills.


s: At the Hour of the Horse avoid raising a roof-tree,


s: for by the trampling of his hoofs it may


s: And at the Hour of the cunning Rat go not near a


s: soothsayer, for by his cunning he may mislead


s: the oracle, and the hopes of the enquirer come


s: This ricksha is more comfortable than some.


s: The springs are not broken, and the seat is covered


s: Also the runner is young and sturdy, and his legs flash


s: Between the shafts he trots easily and familiarly, lifting


s: his knees prettily and holding his shoulders


s: His hips are lean and narrow as a filly's; his calves


s: He is a modern, I perceive, for he wears no queue.


s: Above a rounded neck rises a shock of hair the shade


s: of dusty coal. Each hair is stiff and erect as a


s: brush bristle. There are lice in them no doubt--


s: but then perhaps we of the West are too squeamish


s: What interests me chiefly is the back of his ears. Not


s: that they are extraordinary as ears; it is their


s: very normality that touches me. I find them


s: smaller than those of a horse, but undoubtedly


s: There is no denying the truth of evolution;


s: Yet as a beast of burden man is distinctly inferior.


s: At home I am a democrat. A republic, a true republic,


s: Yet beholding the back of the ears of a trotting man


s: I perceive it to be impossible--the millennium


s: I grow insufferably superior and Anglo-Saxon.


s: Whence do you come, and whither make return, you


s: Over the mountain passes; through the Great Wall; to


s: Here in the city you are alien, even as I am alien.


s: Your sidling jaw, your pendulous neck--incredible--and


s: that slow smile about your eyes and lip,


s: About you some far sense of mystery, some tawny


s: Silently, with the dignity of the desert, your caravans


s: move among the hurrying hordes, remote and


s: But whence are you, and whither do you make return?


s: He who was born in the clash of a western city dwells


s: Seven servants he has, seven men-servants. They


s: move about quietly and their slippered feet make


s: no sound. Behind their almond eyes move green,


s: sidelong shadows, and their limber hands are


s: In his house the riches of the Orient are gathered.


s: Ivory he has, carved in a thousand quaint, enticing


s: shapes--pleasant to the hand, smooth with the


s: And jade is there, dark green and milky white, with


s: amber from Korea and strange gems--beryl,


s: His lacquered shelves hold priceless pottery--peachblow


s: glazed like the new moon, fired how long ago


s: for a moon-pale princess of the East, whose very


s: In his vaults are incredible textures and colors that


s: Stiff with gold brocade they are, or soft as the coat of


s: a fawn--these sacred robes of a long dead priest,


s: silks of a gold-skinned courtesan, embroideries of


s: When he unfolds them the shimmering heaps are like


s: living opals, burning and moving darkly with the


s: And other priceless things the collector has, so that


s: in many days he could not look upon them all.


s: Every morning his seven men-servants dress him, and


s: every evening they undress him. Behind their


s: almond eyes move green sidelong shadows.


s: In this silent courtyard the collector lives.


s: In the aisle of the cathedral it lies, an army rifle of


s: It is laid on the black and white mosaic, between the


s: carved oaken pews and the strip of brown carpet


s: A crimson light from the stained-glass window yonder


s: glints on the blue steel of its barrel, and the


s: khaki of its shoulder-strap blends with the brown


s: The stiff backs of its owner and a hundred like him


s: "O God, who art the author of peace and lover of


s: concord,... defend us thy humble servants


s: "Amen!" say the owners of the khaki backs.


s: The light has shifted a little. On the blue steel barrel


s: of the rifle the glint is turquoise now.


s: That will be from the robe of the shepherd in the window


s: Up and down, up and down, paces the sentry.


s: He is dressed in a uniform of khaki and his socks are


s: green. Over his shoulder is slung a rifle, and


s: from his belt hang a pistol and cartridge pouch.


s: He is, I think, Malay and Chinese mixed.


s: Behind him the rocky islands, hazed in blue, the yellow


s: sun-drenched water, the tropic shore, pass as a


s: Yet he is here to guard against a nightmare, an


s: anachronism, something that I cannot grasp.


s: Piracy! The very name is fantastic in my ears, colored


s: And yet the ordinance is clear: "Four armed guards,


s: strong metal grills behind the bridge, the engine-room


s: Up and down, up and down he paces, between the


s: Am I then so far removed from life, so wrapped in


s: cotton wool, so deep-sunk in the soft lap of civilization,


s: that I cannot feel the cold splash of truth?


s: It is a disquieting thought--for certainly piracy seems


s: The socks of the sentry annoy me. They are _too_


s: I should feel much cooler if he wouldn't pace so.


s: Beneath the leaning, rain-washed sky this great white


s: In three white terraces the circle lies, piled one on


s: one toward Heaven. And on each terrace the


s: white balustrade climbs in aspiring marble, etched


s: For this is worship native as the air, wide as the


s: Beneath the leaning sky this great white circle!


s: It is not yet morning and the live darkness pushes


s: about us, a greedy darkness that has swallowed


s: In all the world there is left only my chair, with the


s: There are also, it is true, the undersides of trees in


s: the lantern-light and the stony path that flows


s: Only I and the chair and the darkness are permanent.


s: We have been moving so since time was in the


s: It is not unlike an invalid chair, and I, in it, am swaddled


s: like an invalid, wrapped in layer on layer


s: But there are no wheels to my chair. I ride on the


s: The tramp of their lifted shoes is the rhythm of being,


s: Save for their feet the bearers are silent. They move


s: softly through the live darkness. But now and


s: again I am shifted skilfully from one shoulder to


s: They strain, and in spite of the cold I know they are


s: And even I am not precisely comfortable.


s: On either side loom featureless black hills, their summits


s: It is something beyond my world I know, something


s: Of nothing Chinese can you be thinking, for you hate


s: them with an automatic hatred--the hatred of


s: the well-fed for the starved, of the warlike for


s: When they cross you, you kick them, viciously, with


s: the drawing back of your silken beard, your


s: black, black beard, from your white teeth.


s: With a snarl you kick them, sputtering curses in short


s: You do not even speak their tongue, so it cannot be


s: Yet neither do you speak the tongue of the master


s: No more do you know of us the "Masters" than you


s: And between us you stand, guarding the street, erect


s: and splendid, lithe and male. Your scarlet turban


s: Yet the green swelling pod, the fruit-like seeds and


s: Rather, like a pitcher plant you are, for hope and all


s: Your slim body, here in the café, moves brightly in


s: and out. Green satin, and a dance, white wine


s: and gleaming laughter, with two nodding earrings--these


s: And in the painted eyes cold steel, and on the lips a


s: Hands that fly ever to the coat lapels, familiar to


s: the wrists and to the hair of men. These too


s: You too perhaps were stranded here, like these poor


s: homesick boys, in this great catch-all where the


s: white race ends, this grim Shanghai that like a


s: You were caught here like these, and who could live,


s: Green satin, and a gleaming throat, and painted eyes


s: Two men sit in judgment on their fellows.


s: Side by side they sit, raised on the pedestal of the law,


s: They are civilization--and they are very grave.


s: One of them is of my own people, a small man, definite,


s: hard-featured, an accurate weapon of small


s: He is heavily built, and when he is still the dignity of


s: the Orient is about him like his robe. His head


s: is large and beautifully domed, his hands tapering


s: But when he speaks his dignity drops from him. His


s: eyes shift quickly from one end of their little slit


s: to the other, his mouth, his full brown mouth,


s: moves over-fast, his hands flicker back and forth.


s: The courtroom is crowded with ominous yellow poverty.


s: A woman, she of the little tortured feet and sullen face,


s: has kidnapped a small boy to sell. A man was


s: caught smuggling opium. A tea-merchant, in


s: dark green silk, complains that he was decoyed


s: and held prisoner in a lodging-house for ransom.


s: A gambling den has been raided and the ivory


s: The prisoners are stoically sullen. The odor of them


s: Above them sit the two men, raised on the pedestal


s: I turn to the man beside me, waiting his case.


s: "Tell me" I ask "of these men, which is the better


s: the other is blind. But Chinese magistrates are


s: bought, and this one sells himself too cheap."


s: "A good man, and quite honest. You see he doesn't


s: The judges put their heads together. They are civilization


s: Here's to the lad with his useful Fifteen,


s: Here's to the Bat who is Lord of the Green


s: With wisdom learnt from ancient teachers,


s: Well have you earned your rest; but yet,


s: With oil, your beauteousness will shrivel.


s: With beaming face, with shoulders bright


s: Gentlemen, change from books to leather!


s: Breathe your fill of the breeze from the hill,


s: Thanking Bliss for the great blue weather.


s: Mellowest mates in the big blue weather!


s: Out on the turf in the great blue weather!


s: There's ever the deathless solace left--


s: Banished now from the stream and heather,


s: Watching the game in the big blue weather!


s: If cursed by a son who declined to play cricket,


s: (Supposing him sound and sufficient in thews,)


s: I'd larrup him well with the third of a wicket,


s: Selecting safe parts of his body to bruise.


s: In his mind such an urchin King Solomon had


s: When he said, Spare the stump, and you bungle the lad!


s: For what in the world is the use of a creature


s: All flabbily bent on avoiding the Pitch?


s: Who wanders about, with a sob in each feature,


s: Devising a headache, inventing a stitch?


s: There surely would be a quick end to my joy


s: If possessed of that monster--the feminine boy!--


s: The feminine boy who declines upon croquet,


s: Or halma, or spillikins (horrible sport!),


s: Or any amusement that's female and pokey,


s: And flatly objects to behave as he ought!


s: Instead of this Thing, fit for punishment drastic,


s: Give, Fortune, a son who is nimble and keen;


s: A bright-hearted sample of human elastic,


s: As fast as an antelope, supple and clean;


s: Far other than he in whose dimples there lodge


s: Ay, give me the lad who is eager and chubby,


s: Who'd think it a positive crime to grow tubby,


s: And dreams half the night he's a Steel or a Studd!


s: There's the youth for my fancy, all youngsters above--


s: The boy for my handshake, the lad for my love!


s: Come, poke the fire, pull round the screen,


s: And in their graves our sires shall flame


s: And toughness dwindles from the stage!--


s: To smirch their souls, to crack their thews,


s: _(Written for W.G. Grace's Fiftieth Anniversary.)_


s: Thought lusty thumps the best of sport, Sir,


s: Were just the code the nobles taught, Sir,


s: Their jests were coarse, and swift their coursers,


s: Their throats were hoarse and strong as hawsers;


s: To hammer friendly helms with zeal, Sir,


s: The Tourney rang with lyres of steel, Sir!


s: The stumps, the ball, the burst of cheers, Sir!


s: Thus horse-play broke on Time's rough breakers


s: But guarded stumps, and wrote their rhymes,


s: And helped to keep the land from crimes.


s: In dreams were jousting once again, Sir,


s: Wore helmets, gorgets, plumes, and greaves, Sir;


s: While Tourneys stayed, big sport was played


s: Without the joy of turned-up sleeves, Sir!


s: The pitch the throne, the monarch Grace!


s: The drives from liberal shoulders poured,


s: This Toast, good comrades, let us quaff--


s: Mixed length-balls with his dazzlin' Yorkers,


s: Here I've stood, an' I've met him smilin',


s: When reg'lar fizzers tickled the stumps.


s: Playin' him straight an' storin' breath, Sir,


s: I've had a rare old tussle with Death, Sir,


s: Slammin' the loose 'uns, smotherin' twist!


s: While pluck an' muscle an' sight befriend.


s: I'm slow, in course; an' at times a stitch, Sir,


s: But I'm not yet ready to leave the pitch, Sir,


s: Old Death will have his chance to scoff;


s: It'll do me down! But if he's a chap, Sir,


s: No doubt he'll give his foe a clap, Sir,


s: 'Twas never the wrong 'un, fast or slow;


s: The game's been missus an' kids to me, Sir--


s: I met her first at my father's knee, Sir,


s: An' married her young on Richmond Green.


s: When the long day's fun at last is over,


s: I'll love her still in the churchyard cold!


s: I've never twisted my brain with thinkin'


s: But lessons here there ain't no blinkin'


s: Death, who diddles both young and mellow,


s: Flew from his hand the matchless skimmer!


s: Beating the bat and the eyes grown dimmer,


s: His head on his breast, with Mercy friending,


s: The batsman walked to his silent ending,


s: Wept and cheered when by craft was ended


s: He told his mates that he wished, when hoary


s: To trudge with his old brown bag to Glory,


s: There was the rope for the handle's tying!


s: Scarred and shabby it went. We espied it


s: Deep where the grave so soon would hide it,


s: Safe on his heart, with his togs inside it--


s: You're jaundiced, crumpled, footled, spent.


s: This theatre-bubble, come, Tom, prick it!


s: Old chap, of course I'll see you through,


s: That tricked your taste with cards and drink,


s: Shall cause both head and heart to thrive.


s: Condemns the toast, pooh-poohs the bacon:


s: Wait till you lose your wind and reach--


s: The figures up by bounds and leaps, Sir;


s: You, lord of curl on shaven plots, Sir--


s: Prepared to bruise the railings. Lots, Sir!


s: And hope for centuries from your wrist--


s: "That's six!" screams Noel to the scorer.


s: This game, like candles, must be snuffered.


s: Quaint Puck himself may bowl half-volleys,


s: Here in the grass, with our work at heel,


s: _(W.G. Grace's XI. versus XXII. of Bath.)_


s: And Diccory Dizzard, as fast as a blizzard,


s: Seemed twice the breadth of postern door.


s: Bowls fierce at your timber-yard treasured,


s: Some fill their hands for love of bloom,


s: For blooms, and smell their wholesome savour;


s: Of pads and bails and slow leg-twisters.


s: Here's to the freckles and fielding and fun,


s: Here's to the Game that will glow in the sun


s: When the babes of our babies are--Yonder!


s: ~The House of Merrilees~. ARCHIBALD MARSHALL. _[Now Ready_.


s: ~The Unequal Yoke~. Mrs. H.H. PENROSE. _[Now Ready_.


s: ~The Discipline of Christine~. Mrs. BARRÉ GOLDIE. _[Now Ready_.


s: ~Peter Binney, Undergraduate~. ARCHIBALD MARSHALL. _[Now Ready_.


s: ~Peace on Earth~. REGINALD TURNER. _[Now Ready_.


s: ~The Countermine~. ARTHUR WENLOCK. _[Now Ready_.


s: ~The Friendships of Veronica~. THOMAS COBB. [May 17.


s: ~Hugh Revel, A Public School Story~. LIONEL PORTMAN. [July 25.]


s: In issuing a list of new and forthcoming publications, Mr. Alston


s: respectively. In the former the ways and moods of childhood are


s: ~The Soul of London.~ FORD MADOX HUEFFER. Author of "The Life of


s: ~More Cricket Songs.~ NORMAN GALE. Imperial 16mo, 2_s._ nett.


s: ~Spring Blossoms and Summer Fruit.~ JOHN BYLES. Cloth, Crown 8vo,


s: These "Sunday Morning Talks to Children" are full of charm and


s: London: ALSTON RIVERS, 13, Arundel Street.


s: ~Creatures that once were Men~. MAXIM GORKY. With Introductory by


s: It is one thing to be a famous writer; it is another to be widely


s: encyclopædic, topographical, or archæological, and beyond that


s: altogether original, this attraction being intensified by the


s: "The ~best mystery novel~ since Sir A. Conan Doyle's 'Sign of


s: "A really satisfactory tale of mystery is always ~sure of its


s: welcome~, and 'The House of Merrilees' ought to secure wide


s: 'Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house,


s: Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.


s: The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,


s: In the hope that St. Nicholas soon would be there.


s: The children were nestled all snug in their beds,


s: While visions of sugar-plums danced in their heads.


s: And mamma in her kerchief, and I in my cap,


s: Had just settled our brains for a long winter's nap;


s: When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,


s: I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.


s: Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.


s: The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow


s: Gave the lustre of midday to objects below--


s: When what to my wondering eyes should appear


s: But a miniature sleigh and eight tiny reindeer.


s: With a little old driver so lively and quick,


s: More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,


s: And he whistled and shouted and called them by name--


s: To the top of the porch, to the top of the wall!


s: Now, dash away! Dash away! Dash away! All!"


s: As dry leaves before the wild hurricane fly,


s: When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky,


s: So up to the house-top the coursers they flew


s: With the sleigh full of toys, and St. Nicholas, too.


s: And then in a twinkling I heard on the roof


s: The prancing and pawing of each tiny hoof.


s: As I drew in my head, and was turning around,


s: Down the chimney St. Nicholas came with a bound.


s: He was dressed all in fur from his head to his foot,


s: And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot;


s: A bundle of toys he had flung on his back,


s: And he looked like a pedlar just opening his pack.


s: His eyes--how they twinkled! His dimples, how merry!


s: His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry;


s: His droll little mouth was drawn up in a bow,


s: And the beard on his chin was as white as the snow.


s: The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,


s: And the smoke, it encircled his head like a wreath.


s: He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,


s: And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself.


s: A wink of his eye, and a twist of his head,


s: Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread.


s: He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,


s: And filled all the stockings--then turned with a jerk,


s: And laying his finger aside of his nose,


s: And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose.


s: He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,


s: And away they all flew, like the down of a thistle;


s: But I heard him exclaim ere he drove out of sight,


s: "Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!"


s: 'Twas the night after Christmas, and all through the house


s: Not a creature was stirring--excepting a mouse.


s: The stockings were flung in haste over the chair,


s: For hopes of St. Nicholas were no longer there.


s: The children were restlessly tossing in bed,


s: For the pie and the candy were heavy as lead;


s: While mamma in her kerchief, and I in my gown,


s: Had just made up our minds that we would not lie down,


s: When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,


s: I sprang from my chair to see what was the matter.


s: Flung open the shutter, and threw up the sash.


s: The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow,


s: Gave the lustre of noon-day to objects below.


s: When what to my long anxious eyes should appear


s: But a horse and a sleigh, both old-fashioned and queer;


s: With a little old driver, so solemn and slow,


s: I knew at a glance it must be Dr Brough.


s: I drew in my head, and was turning around,


s: When upstairs came the Doctor, with scarcely a sound,


s: He wore a thick overcoat, made long ago,


s: And the beard on his chin was white with the snow.


s: He spoke a few words, and went straight to his work;


s: He felt all the pulses,--then turned with a jerk,


s: And laying his finger aside of his nose,


s: With a nod of his head to the chimney he goes:--


s: "A spoonful of oil, ma'am, if you have it handy;


s: No nuts and no raisins, no pies and no candy.


s: These tender young stomachs cannot well digest


s: All the sweets that they get; toys and books are the best.


s: But I know my advice will not find many friends,


s: For the custom of Christmas the other way tends.


s: The fathers and mothers, and Santa Claus, too,


s: Are exceedingly blind. Well, a good-night to you!"


s: And I heard him exclaim, as he drove out of sight:


s: These feastings and candies make Doctors' bills right!"


s: Bertie was a very good boy. He was kind, obedient, truthful, and


s: unselfish. He had, however, one great fault,--he always forgot.


s: His father and mother talked the matter over, and decided that


s: something must be done to make the little boy remember.


s: "Santa Claus may forget some of those things," said his mother.


s: Bertie wept for an hour. Then his mother told him they were all


s: It was very strange to Bertie, but on grandpa's tree he found


s: "Why," said Tita, "his feet are all bare!"


s: That night, after Tita had said her prayers, she said:


s: After thinking the matter over, Mrs. Howard decided she would say


s: Time passed on, and winter set in, and full of the delights of


s: skating, the boys forgot all about the expected arrival of their


s: During the Christmas holidays the boys one morning started off to


s: On the way to her cottage the old woman asked him all sorts of


s: But the Squire's skates were not to be won by him, for on the


s: sprained, for she could not bear to put it to the ground.


s: Poor Leslie! He turned first red, then white, and then said, in a


s: One night she said, "We ought to have a party before Santa Claus


s: "I can get the supper," added a big rag doll. The other dolls had


s: "We don't have no good times," sighed little Peter.


s: "We can't slide. We haven't any sleds," whimpered Jimmy.


s: "Why, of course boys can't have a good time without sleds," said


s: grandma, cheerily. "Let us look about and see if we can't find


s: When the sleds were finished she dyed them red and drew a yellow


s: It had seemed to the little Wendell children that they would have


s: So all day long they were busy arranging five tableaux for the


s: Miss Marcelle had arranged everything so nicely, and Celeste, the


s: So all the children came in rosy and smiling.


s: "Why, didn't you know us?" asked the little Lord Admiral.


s: And this is why they sing on that morning more than on any


s: other. After the birds have found shelter from the north wind on


s: Her papa smiled, and handed the open letter to her mamma.


s: But her mamma folded the letter and said nothing.


s: On Christmas eve the box, which had just arrived, was opened, and


s: "Oh, what fun!" gayly exclaimed the child. "Did uncle tell you to


s: It was a turkey for one,--for only Uncle Roy's niece. But all the


s: The old fir tree, whose high branches almost touched the roof,


s: knew all about those shadows, but it was so old no one could ever


s: "There's something scratching on the door," whispered Jessie; but


s: Christmas goodies and was trying his best to find a way into the


s: pantry and test them with his sharp teeth.


s: "Come," said Jessie, "we'll turn to icicles if we stay here much,


s: "Poor thing," said papa, "you shall come inside till morning."


s: Papa smiled and looked at mamma, and then everybody said "Merry


s: "It was the day before Christmas. Mother was at the house of a


s: "Mother advised us to go to bed and wait until morning to see our


s: "Oh! I hope I shall have what I want to-morrow!" said Gracie.


s: "Good-night, and call us early in the morning."


s: Each little letter ended with,--"Just like Brother's."


s: One night, after they had gone to bed, Jamie said, "Ted, if Santa


s: "Oh, yes; and if we get fur mittens it will be such fun to make a


s: "I guess you won't," Jamie said, speaking loudly.


s: "Because it'll be as much my sled as yours."


s: "Yes, of course," Ted replied; "but I chose it first."


s: Suddenly Jamie cried, "O Ted, here's a letter!"


s: "My dear Boys,--No sled this year. It quarrelled so I was


s: afraid to bring it. I dropped it off the load about a week


s: ago. Get ready for it next year. Merry Christmas! SANTA


s: There was an Old Derry down Derry, who loved to see little folks


s: So he made them a Book, and with laughter they shook


s: (The greater part of which were originally


s: That my nose is too long, you are certainly wrong!"


s: Whose Grandmother threatened to burn her;


s: But she seized on the Cat, and said, "Granny, burn that!


s: He ran up and down in his Grandmother's gown,


s: He sate on the stairs, eating apples and pears,


s: But they called out, "Oh, law! you're a horrid old bore!"


s: So they smashed that Old Man with a gong.


s: He spent all that money in onions and honey,


s: Who was thirsty, and called out for some beer;


s: But they brought it quite hot, in a small copper pot,


s: When they said, "Does it buzz?" he replied, "Yes, it does!


s: She twirled round and round, till she sank underground,


s: Which distressed all the people of Chertsey.


s: So she had it made sharp, and purchased a harp,


s: But he played day and night, till the "sarpint" took flight,


s: She climbed up a tree to examine the sea,


s: But declared she would never leave Portugal.


s: Whose conduct grew friskier and friskier;


s: He danced hornpipes and jigs, and ate thousands of figs,


s: When that did not agree, he took Camomile Tea,


s: When they said, "No, you ain't!" he was ready to faint,


s: Till at last with a hammer they silenced his clamor.


s: For while he was able, he slept on a table,


s: When they said, "You'll grow fatter!" he answered "What matter?"


s: But the length of its ears so promoted his fears,


s: Who rushed through a field of blue clover;


s: But some very large Bees stung his nose and his knees,


s: She sat on a stool and ate gooseberry-fool,


s: But in handing his daughter, he fell into the water,


s: He sang "High dum diddle," and played on the fiddle,


s: He purchased a steed, which he rode at full speed,


s: That the street door was partially closed;


s: But some very large Rats ate his coats and his hats,


s: When he'd eaten eighteen, he turned perfectly green,


s: Upon which he relinquished those habits.


s: When they said, "Does it fit?" he replied, "Not a bit!"


s: Whose daughters wore bottle-green veils:


s: They caught several Fish, which they put in a dish,


s: But they said, "Tell us whether your shoes are of leather,


s: Was so long that it reached to her toes;


s: So she hired an Old Lady, whose conduct was steady,


s: When the door squeezed her flat, she exclaimed, "What of that?"


s: He fed twenty sons upon nothing but buns,


s: But he cried, "With a needle I'll slay you, O beadle!"


s: She played several jigs to her Uncle's white Pigs:


s: He rushed up a Palm when the weather was calm,


s: When they said, "You 're a Guy!" he made no reply,


s: But knocked them all down with his poker.


s: Who was suddenly seized with the plague;


s: But they gave him some butter, which caused him to mutter,


s: But once, by mistake, in a stove she did bake


s: But a laudable cook fished him out with a hook,


s: Which he took with a spoon, by the light of the moon,


s: So he purchased some muffs, some furs, and some fluffs,


s: He gazed at the moon every evening in June,


s: But, though split quite in two, with some very strong glue


s: Till he cut off his thumbs, and said calmly, "This comes


s: When they said, "That's your toe," he replied, "Is it so?"


s: Till a great bit of muffin, on which he was stuffing,


s: He paid several cousins to catch them by dozens,


s: But in swallowing a dish that was quite full of Fish,


s: He was choked, that Old Man of the South.


s: But they said, "It ain't pleasant to see you at present,


s: When he said, "I will scratch it!" they gave him a hatchet,


s: She ran up a tree, and said "Fiddle-de-dee!"


s: He went with one prance from Turkey to France,


s: But one day, to his grief, she married a thief,


s: So he rushed up and down, till the sun made him brown,


s: When the flames burnt his book, to drinking he took,


s: When disturbed by the Crows, he abruptly arose,


s: Whereon, by a thorn her dress being torn,


s: When she said, "Let me out," he exclaimed, "Without doubt


s: You will pass all your life in that box."


s: So to keep him awake they fed him with cake,


s: But quickly snapt up he was once by a Puppy,


s: But he tore it in pieces, to give to his Nieces,


s: But she cried out, "Oh, lack! I have married a black!"


s: Which distressed that Old Man of Jamaica.


s: I will sit on this stile, and continue to smile,


s: Which may soften the heart of that Cow."


s: Some she killed with a thump, some she drowned at the pump,


s: So to make it look big he purchased a wig,


s: When they said, "Is it small?" he replied, "Not at all;


s: Who screamed so that no one could hush her;


s: Her screams were extreme,--no one heard such a scream


s: At the sound of each sweep she enraptured the deep,


s: He tore off his boots, and subsisted on roots,


s: But they all ate so much, and their conduct was such,


s: That it killed that Old Man of the East.


s: But when it was cold he relinquished his hold,


s: His gait and his waddle were held as a model


s: When they said, "Is it hot?" he replied, "No, it's not!"


s: But they said, "Never mind! you will fall off behind,


s: Till he once, by mistake, was mixed up in a cake,


s: So they set him to spin on his nose and his chin,


s: For stealing some pigs, some coats, and some wigs,


s: Whose conduct was strange and unmannerly;


s: He rushed down the Strand with a Pig in each hand,


s: When she lifted her hook, she exclaimed, "Only look!"


s: Whose praise all the world was a-telling;


s: She played on the harp, and caught several Carp,


s: That accomplished Young Lady of Welling.


s: But he screeched to his Wife, and she said, "Oh, my life!


s: Your death will be felt by all Tartary!"


s: But they said, "It's absurd to encourage this bird!"


s: So they smashed that Old Man of Whitehaven.


s: When they cried, "Weedon Station!" she made no observation,


s: But thought she should go back to Sweden.


s: They threw some large stones, which broke most of his bones,


s: And displeased that Old Person of Chester.


s: Till the Ape, one dark night, set the house all alight,


s: When they said, "How d' ye do?" he replied, "Who are you?"


s: And when he was found, they said he was drowned,


s: She walked seventy miles, and leaped fifteen stiles,


s: So she put it to boil by the aid of some oil,


s: When they said, "Are these caps?" she answered, "Perhaps!"


s: Who had twenty-five sons and one "darter;"


s: He fed them on Snails, and weighed them in scales,


s: But they all flew away at the closing of day,


s: Which relieved that Old Man and his nose.


s: When the day turned out fine, she ceased to repine,


s: Who possessed a large Cow, but he lost her;


s: But they said, "Don't you see she has run up a tree,


s: She dressed in a sack spickle-speckled with black,


s: When she found she was tired, she abruptly expired,


s: But its color and size so bedazzled her eyes,


s: That she very soon went back to Dorking.


s: So he sat on a Chair till he died of despair,


s: When he found he grew stiff, he jumped over the cliff,


s: So he sate on a chair with his feet in the air,


s: I have pulled day and night, till my hair has grown white,


s: He sat on a rail, and imbibed bitter ale,


s: Which refreshed that Old Man and his Owl.


s: When they said, "Sir, you'll fall!" he replied, "Not at all!"


s: But to make it more nice, he inserted some Mice,


s: Which refreshed that Old Person of Ewell.


s: So he tore off his hair, and behaved like a bear,


s: Two Owls and a Hen, four Larks and a Wren,


s: Have all built their nests in my beard."


s: When she opened them wide, people all turned aside,


s: She purchased some clogs, and some small spotty Dogs,


s: Came untied when the birds sate upon it;


s: But she said, "I don't care! all the birds in the air


s: They took some honey, and plenty of money


s: Oh! let us be married; too long we have tarried:


s: "Dear Pig, are you willing to sell for one shilling


s: So they took it away, and were married next day


s: They dined on mince and slices of quince,


s: And hand in hand, on the edge of the sand,


s: And I long to go out in the world beyond:


s: "I would sit quite still, and say nothing but 'Quack'


s: Perhaps, on the whole, it might bring me luck;


s: Which is, if you'll let me speak so bold,


s: Your feet are unpleasantly wet and cold,


s: And I bought four pairs of worsted socks,


s: And, to keep out the cold, I've bought a cloak;


s: But to balance me well, dear Duck, sit steady,


s: So away they went with a hop and a bound;


s: And they hopped the whole world three times round.


s: And, if you went, you'd see such sights!


s: And, more than all, the king and queen,--


s: Would please the shrimps and cockles round,


s: And reached the great Gromboolian Plain;


s: In spite of all their friends could say,


s: And when the sieve turned round and round,


s: And every one cried, "You'll all be drowned!"


s: They called aloud, "Our sieve ain't big;


s: But we don't care a button, we don't care a fig:


s: Their heads are green, and their hands are blue


s: "Oh! won't they be soon upset, you know?


s: For the sky is dark, and the voyage is long;


s: And, happen what may, it's extremely wrong


s: Their heads are green, and their hands are blue;


s: So, to keep them dry, they wrapped their feet


s: And they passed the night in a crockery-jar;


s: And each of them said, "How wise we are!


s: Though the sky be dark, and the voyage be long,


s: Yet we never can think we were rash or wrong,


s: When we live in a sieve and a crockery-jar!


s: And all night long, in the moonlight pale,


s: They sailed to the Western Sea, they did,--


s: And they bought an owl, and a useful cart,


s: And a pound of rice, and a cranberry-tart,


s: And they bought a pig, and some green jackdaws,


s: And in twenty years they all came back,--


s: And every one said, "How tall they've grown!


s: For they've been to the Lakes, and the Torrible Zone,


s: And they drank their health, and gave them a feast


s: The Nutcrackers sate by a plate on the table;


s: The Sugar-tongs sate by a plate at his side;


s: And the Nutcrackers said, "Don't you wish we were able


s: Along the blue hills and green meadows to ride?


s: Must we drag on this stupid existence forever,


s: While every one else takes his pleasure, and never


s: Seems happy unless he is riding a horse?


s: "Don't you think we could ride without being instructed,


s: Our legs are so long, and so aptly constructed,


s: I'm sure that an accident could not occur.


s: Let us all of a sudden hop down from the table,


s: And hustle downstairs, and each jump on a horse!


s: Shall we try? Shall we go? Do you think we are able?"


s: The Sugar-tongs answered distinctly, "Of course!"


s: So down the long staircase they hopped in a minute;


s: The Sugar-tongs snapped, and the Crackers said "Crack!"


s: The stable was open; the horses were in it:


s: Each took out a pony, and jumped on his back.


s: The Cat in a fright scrambled out of the doorway;


s: The Mice tumbled out of a bundle of hay;


s: The brown and white Rats, and the black ones from Norway,


s: Screamed out, "They are taking the horses away!"


s: The whole of the household was filled with amazement:


s: The Cups and the Saucers danced madly about;


s: The Plates and the Dishes looked out of the casement;


s: The Salt-cellar stood on his head with a shout;


s: The Spoons, with a clatter, looked out of the lattice;


s: The Soup-ladle peeped through a heap of veal-patties,


s: And squeaked with a ladle-like scream of surprise.


s: The Frying-pan said, "It's an awful delusion!"


s: The Tea-kettle hissed, and grew black in the face;


s: And they all rushed downstairs in the wildest confusion


s: To see the great Nutcracker-Sugar-tong race.


s: And out of the stable, with screamings and laughter


s: (Their ponies were cream-colored, speckled with brown),


s: The Nutcrackers first, and the Sugar-tongs after;


s: Rode all round the yard, and then all round the town.


s: They rode through the street, and they rode by the station;


s: They galloped away to the beautiful shore;


s: In silence they rode, and "made no observation,"


s: Save this: "We will never go back any more!"


s: And still you might hear, till they rode out of hearing,


s: The Sugar-tongs snap, and the Crackers say "Crack!"


s: Till, far in the distance their forms disappearing,


s: They faded away; and they never came back!


s: While, perched on tree or house or steeple,


s: And they each sang a song, ding-a-dong, ding-a-dong!


s: Mr. Poker he sate quite upright in the coach;


s: Miss Shovel was dressed all in black (with a brooch);


s: "O Shovely so lovely!" the Poker he sang,


s: Ding-a-dong, ding-a-dong! If you're pleased with my song,


s: When you scrape up the coals with a delicate sound,


s: Your nose is so shiny, your head is so round,


s: And your shape is so slender and bright!


s: "Alas! Mrs. Broom," sighed the Tongs in his song,


s: And my legs are so long,--ding-a-dong, ding-a-dong!--


s: Ah! fairest of creatures, when sweeping the room,


s: Must you needs be so cruel, you beautiful Broom,


s: Mrs. Broom and Miss Shovel together they sang,


s: Said the Shovel, "I'll certainly hit you a bang!"


s: Said the Broom, "And I'll sweep you away!"


s: So the coachman drove homeward as fast as he could,


s: But they put on the kettle, and little by little


s: Then they came to a country which was wholly covered with immense


s: The four children then entered into conversation with the


s: On which Violet, who was perfectly acquainted with the art of


s: There was a family of two old Parrots and seven young Parrots.


s: There was a family of two old Storks and seven young Storks.


s: There was a family of two old Geese and seven young Geese.


s: There was a family of two old Owls and seven young Owls.


s: There was a family of two old Cats and seven young Cats.


s: And there was a family of two old Fishes and seven young Fishes.


s: and screamed, and shrieked, and squealed,


s: more violently than ever; and after they


s: And that was the end of the seven young Storks.


s: On which they incautiously began to sing aloud,


s: And listen, oh! listen, oh! listen to me!"


s: On which the seven young Geese were greatly alarmed, and all of a


s: So that was the end of the seven young Geese.


s: On which a mouse answered, "Squeaky-peeky-weeky! yes, it is!"


s: So that was the end of the seven young Owls.


s: And that was the end of the seven young Guinea Pigs.


s: And this was the end of the seven young Cats.


s: And that was the end of the seven young Fishes.


s: Extract from "The Nonsense Gazette," for August, 1870.


s: When the whole is thus minced, brush it up hastily with a new


s: I was on my way from London to Guildford, in a railway carriage,


s: (The ladies looked puzzled, as indeed was I, the author.)


s: "Do you not know who is the writer of it?" asked the gentleman.


s: "The name is 'Edward Lear,'" said one of the ladies.


s: "But," said the lady, doubtingly, "here is a dedication to the


s: extinguisher's attention, I speedily reduced him to silence.


s: When disturbed by the mice, she appeased them with rice,


s: Whose feelings were wrung with compunction


s: When they said, "The Train's gone!" he exclaimed, "How forlorn!"


s: But remained on the rails of the Junction.


s: Large apples and pears, which he threw unawares


s: But they said, "If you choose to boil eggs in your shoes,


s: When they said, "Tell us why?" he made no reply,


s: When he said, "It's enough!" they only said, "Stuff!


s: But in fishing by night, it supported a light,


s: When he grew melancholy, they said, "His name's Polly,"


s: When they asked, "Are they pleasant?" he said, "Not at present!"


s: She nurs'd the small fishes, and washed all the dishes,


s: He sate in the dust, eating spiders and crust,


s: All the mice and the cats, and the snakes and the rats,


s: When he'd gone out a mile, he observ'd with a smile,


s: But he said, "Do not fail, if it happen to hail,


s: When it chirped in his ear, he was smitten with fear,


s: For he said, "I'll sit still, and will roll them down hill,


s: For the fish in the depths of the Dargle."


s: They dressed him in white, and roll'd him up tight,


s: He sate on a log, and sang songs to a frog,


s: But they said, "Don't you wish, you mayn't look like a fish,


s: Chickabee, Chickabaw." And he said nothing more,


s: But they said, "Take some snuff!--You have talk'd quite enough,


s: He sate on a wheel, eating underdone veal,


s: Which relieved that old man of Three Bridges.


s: He lay on his back, with his head in a sack,


s: She wore a long shawl, over bonnet and all,


s: They sang him a ballad, and fed him on salad,


s: So they took off his boots, and fed him with fruits,


s: Who looked out at the depths of the night;


s: But the birds of the air, filled her heart with despair,


s: But they said, "If you sneeze, you might damage the trees,


s: When he opened the door, for one minute or more,


s: With a bonnet of leather, and three lines of feather,


s: Where he studied his books, with the wrens and the rooks,


s: But they said, "O my daughter, there's nothing but water!"


s: When she said, "Tick-a-tack!" they only said, "Quack!"


s: Whose food was roast spiders and chutney,


s: Which he took with his tea, within sight of the sea,


s: When they said, "Go away!" she continued to stay,


s: He sate on a rail, with his head in a pail,


s: For he said, "More than that, would make me too fat,"


s: When they said, "Yes, it is," she replied only, "Whizz!"


s: When they asked him, "What for?" he replied, "You're a bore!


s: And I trust you'll go out of my garden."


s: Whose daughters did nothing to please her;


s: She dressed them in gray, and banged them all day,


s: Which choked that old person of Florence.


s: He sate in the water, and drank bottled porter,


s: When they ask'd, "Does it trot?" he said, "Certainly not!


s: When he fanned off her head, she smiled sweetly, and said,


s: Whose movements were scroobious and queer;


s: Being slender and tall, he looked over a wall,


s: And perceived two fat ducks of Cashmere.


s: But they call'd out, "Oh well! don't it look like a bell!"


s: Which perplexed that old person of Cassel.


s: He sate in a cart, and ate cold apple tart,


s: He danced with the cat, and made tea in his hat,


s: Which vexed all the folks on the Border.


s: For he said, "To eat mice is not proper or nice,"


s: He danced perfectly well, to the sound of a bell,


s: For they said, "If mixed up with some cold claret-cup,


s: But they said, "If you do, we will thump you quite blue,


s: He wreathed them with lilies and daffy-down-dillies,


s: Whose manners were scroobious and strange;


s: He sailed to St. Blubb in a waterproof tub,


s: He tore all the rugs, and broke all the jugs,


s: But they said, "Is it wrong, since your legs are so long,


s: He stood on his head till his waistcoat turned red,


s: Which he picked off the ground, with the other birds round,


s: Who possessed a large nose like a trumpet;


s: When he blew it aloud, it astonished the crowd,


s: And was heard through the whole of West Dumpet.


s: But they said, "Don't you see what a brute you must be,


s: Whereon one fine day he rode wholly away,


s: But they said, "Without doubt, you will soon wear them out,


s: They walked out together in all sorts of weather,


s: Whose garments were border'd with Spinach;


s: But a large spotty Calf bit her shawl quite in half,


s: Which alarmed that young lady of Greenwich.


s: Those she placed on a stool, and to make them feel cool


s: Till a Crab who came near fill'd their bosoms with fear,


s: And they said, "Would we'd never left Hyde!"


s: She purchased two parrots, and fed them with carrots,


s: Which he took up and down all the streets of the town,


s: When they said, "You are wrong!" he merely said "Bong!"


s: When they said, "Well! I never!" he cried, "Scythes for ever!"


s: On the top, in fine weather, she wore a gold feather;


s: Who said, "Gracious! Goodness! O Gimini!"


s: When they said, "Please be still!" she ran down a hill,


s: When it grew out of sight, she exclaimed in a fright,


s: He drove a small gig, with three Owls and a Pig,


s: Which distressed all the people of Ealing.


s: But they brought him a hat, and said, "Sit upon that,


s: You abruptious old man of Thames Ditton!"


s: To his ducks and his pigs, whom he fed upon figs,


s: She sate in a ditch, although no one knew which,


s: And composed a small treatise on history.


s: So they gave him some soap, and said coldly, "We hope


s: But they said, "If you cough, you are safe to fall off!


s: When they screamed in the nest, he screamed out with the rest,


s: Who said, "If you needle or pin shall see


s: On the floor of my room, sweep it up with the broom!"


s: But the birds of the air pluck'd them perfectly bare,


s: Which she fed upon ham, and hot raspberry jam,


s: It curled up a tree, and all over the sea,


s: Some she slew with a kick, some she scrunched with a stick,


s: But they said, "Towr'ds the night he may probably bite,


s: Which might vex you, old man of Boulak!"


s: They buzz'd a sweet tune, to the light of the moon,


s: Of lobsters and spice, pickled onions and mice,


s: But, growing too stout, he could never get out,


s: So he passed all his life in that kettle.


s: When they tumbled down dead, he grew weary, and said,


s: He bought an Umbrella, and sate in the cellar,


s: Which pleased all the people of Shoreham.


s: Which she painted pea-green, to appear more serene,


s: But with blamable haste she devoured some hot paste,


s: Which destroyed that young person of Kew.


s: She purchased a whistle, and sate on a thistle,


s: He wore a large ruff of pale straw-colored stuff,


s: So that only his nose, and the end of his toes,


s: Could be seen when he walked about Brigg.


s: She wore a small wig, and rode out on a pig,


s: who resided in a Barrel, and only lived on


s: who always carried a Green Umbrella when it didn't rain,


s: who sate in her Red Morocco Arm Chair and


s: toasted her own Bread at the parlour Fire.


s: who ferried himself across the water with the


s: Kitchen Poker and a New pair of Ear-rings.


s: who carried the Old Owl, and his Crimson Carpet-bag,


s: across the river, because he could not swim.


s: who went to market in a Blue Bonnet and Shawl,


s: who did up her Back Hair every morning with a Wreath of Roses,


s: who read the Newspaper and ate Parsnip Pie


s: who smoked a Pipe of tobacco on the top of


s: whose Face nobody ever saw, because it was


s: who wrote some Verses to a Veal-cutlet in a


s: who stood on a Table, and played sweetly on a


s: whose Head was ever so much bigger than his


s: who carried five Monkeys on his back all


s: A Fourth Book of Nonsense Poems, Songs, Botany, Music, etc.


s: When Storm-clouds brood on the towering heights


s: A light on the Bong-tree stems it throws.


s: And those who watch at that midnight hour


s: The wandering Dong through the forest goes!


s: For the Jumblies came in a sieve, they did,--


s: With the Chorus they daily and nightly sang,--


s: Their heads are green, and their hands are blue,


s: To the plaintive pipe of the lively Dong,


s: With her sky-blue hands and her sea-green hair;


s: Till the morning came of that hateful day


s: When the Jumblies sailed in their sieve away,


s: And the Dong was left on the cruel shore


s: That pea-green sail on the far horizon,--


s: As he sate all day on the grassy hill,--


s: Singing, "O somewhere, in valley or plain,


s: He gathered the bark of the Twangum Tree


s: And tied with cords to the back of his head.


s: To prevent the wind from blowing it out;


s: And with holes all round to send the light


s: And above the wail of the Chimp and Snipe


s: You may hear the squeak of his plaintive pipe,


s: Moving along through the dreary night,--


s: Two old Bachelors were living in one house;


s: One caught a Muffin, the other caught a Mouse.


s: Said he who caught the Muffin to him who caught the Mouse,--


s: "This happens just in time! For we've nothing in the house,


s: Save a tiny slice of lemon and a teaspoonful of honey,


s: And what to do for dinner--since we haven't any money?


s: And what can we expect if we haven't any dinner,


s: But to lose our teeth and eyelashes and keep on growing thinner?"


s: Said he who caught the Mouse to him who caught the Muffin,--


s: "We might cook this little Mouse, if we only had some Stuffin'!


s: If we had but Sage and Onion we could do extremely well;


s: But how to get that Stuffin' it is difficult to tell!"


s: Those two old Bachelors ran quickly to the town


s: And asked for Sage and Onion as they wandered up and down;


s: They borrowed two large Onions, but no Sage was to be found


s: In the Shops, or in the Market, or in all the Gardens round.


s: But some one said, "A hill there is, a little to the north,


s: And to its purpledicular top a narrow way leads forth;


s: And there among the rugged rocks abides an ancient Sage,--


s: An earnest Man, who reads all day a most perplexing page.


s: Climb up, and seize him by the toes,--all studious as he sits,--


s: And pull him down, and chop him into endless little bits!


s: Then mix him with your Onion (cut up likewise into Scraps),--


s: When your Stuffin' will be ready, and very good--perhaps."


s: Those two old Bachelors without loss of time


s: The nearly purpledicular crags at once began to climb;


s: And at the top, among the rocks, all seated in a nook,


s: They saw that Sage a-reading of a most enormous book.


s: But that old Sage looked calmly up, and with his awful book,


s: At those two Bachelors' bald heads a certain aim he took;


s: And over Crag and precipice they rolled promiscuous down,--


s: At once they rolled, and never stopped in lane or field or town;


s: And when they reached their house, they found (besides their want


s: The Mouse had fled--and, previously, had eaten up the Muffin.


s: They left their home in silence by the once convivial door;


s: And from that hour those Bachelors were never heard of more.


s: We think so then, and we thought so still


s: And the great rock walls grow dark and brown,


s: Where the purple river rolls fast and dim


s: And this is the song we nightly snort,--


s: We think so then, and we thought so still!


s: Cranes, and Flamingoes with scarlet back,


s: Plovers and Storks, and Geese in clouds,


s: They ate and drank and danced all night,


s: And echoing back from the rocks you heard


s: The King of the Cranes all grandly dressed.


s: Between the ends of his blue dress-coat;


s: (For though no one speaks of it, every one knows


s: With a wreath of shrimps in her short white hair.


s: For the King of the Cranes had won that heart


s: With a Crocodile's egg and a large fish-tart.


s: She vowed to marry the King of the Cranes,


s: Of endless birds in a lengthening cloud.


s: We heard them singing a lessening cry,--


s: We sit on the sand and watch the moon,--


s: She has gone to the great Gromboolian Plain,


s: We sit on the rocks and watch the moon,--


s: She dwells by the streams of the Chankly Bore.


s: And we probably never shall see her more.


s: We think so then, and we thought so still!


s: When they said, "Some day you may lose them all;"


s: For she said, "The World in general knows


s: There's nothing so good for a Pobble's toes!"


s: But before he set out he wrapped his nose


s: Can come to his toes if his nose is warm;


s: And it's perfectly known that a Pobble's toes


s: When they saw him nearing the further side,--


s: "He has gone to fish, for his Aunt Jobiska's


s: On perceiving that all his toes were gone!


s: How the Pobble was robbed of his twice five toes!


s: And they rowed him back, and carried him up


s: And she made him a feast, at his earnest wish,


s: And she said, "It's a fact the whole world knows,


s: That Pobbles are happier without their toes."


s: There lived an old man in the Kingdom of Tess,


s: And when it was perfectly made and complete,


s: He opened the door and walked into the street.


s: By way of a hat he'd a loaf of Brown Bread,


s: In the middle of which he inserted his head;


s: His Shirt was made up of no end of dead Mice,


s: The warmth of whose skins was quite fluffy and nice;


s: His Drawers were of Rabbit-skins, so were his Shoes;


s: His Stockings were skins, but it is not known whose;


s: His Waistcoat and Trowsers were made of Pork Chops;


s: His Buttons were Jujubes and Chocolate Drops;


s: His Coat was all Pancakes, with Jam for a border,


s: And a girdle of Biscuits to keep it in order;


s: And he wore over all, as a screen from bad weather,


s: A Cloak of green Cabbage-leaves stitched all together.


s: He had walked a short way, when he heard a great noise,


s: Of all sorts of Beasticles, Birdlings, and Boys;


s: And from every long street and dark lane in the town


s: Beasts, Birdies, and Boys in a tumult rushed down.


s: Two Cows and a Calf ate his Cabbage-leaf Cloak;


s: Four Apes seized his Girdle, which vanished like smoke;


s: Three Kids ate up half of his Pancaky Coat,


s: And the tails were devour'd by an ancient He Goat;


s: An army of Dogs in a twinkling tore _up_ his


s: Pork Waistcoat and Trowsers to give to their Puppies;


s: And while they were growling, and mumbling the Chops,


s: Ten Boys prigged the Jujubes and Chocolate Drops.


s: He tried to run back to his house, but in vain,


s: For scores of fat Pigs came again and again:


s: They rushed out of stables and hovels and doors;


s: They tore off his stockings, his shoes, and his drawers;


s: And now from the housetops with screechings descend


s: Striped, spotted, white, black, and gray Cats without end:


s: They jumped on his shoulders and knocked off his hat,


s: When Crows, Ducks, and Hens made a mincemeat of that;


s: They speedily flew at his sleeves in a trice,


s: And utterly tore up his Shirt of dead Mice;


s: They swallowed the last of his Shirt with a squall,--


s: Whereon he ran home with no clothes on at all.


s: And he said to himself, as he bolted the door,


s: "I will not wear a similar dress any more,


s: Any more, any more, any more, never more!"


s: They took up a roll and some Camomile tea,


s: And both were as happy as happy could be,


s: What would become of your new green coat?


s: That perhaps we shall never go down any more!"


s: No tables nor carpets nor household cares;


s: For his Hat was a hundred and two feet wide,


s: And bells, and buttons, and loops, and lace,


s: But the longer I live on this Crumpetty Tree


s: And that life on the whole is far from gay!"


s: (The Fimble Fowl, with a Corkscrew leg);


s: We may build our homes on your lovely Hat,--


s: And the Blue Baboon who played the flute,


s: And the Orient Calf from the Land of Tute,


s: And at night by the light of the Mulberry moon


s: They danced to the Flute of the Blue Baboon,


s: On the broad green leaves of the Crumpetty Tree,


s: And all were as happy as happy could be,


s: Around her bower, with quivering leaves,


s: NOTE.--First published in _Times of India_, Bombay, July, 1874.


s: Who, or why, or which, or _what_, Is the Akond of SWAT?


s: Does he sit on a stool or a sofa or chair,             or SQUAT,


s: Does he drink his soup and his coffee cold,             or HOT,


s: Does he sing or whistle, jabber or talk,


s: And when riding abroad does he gallop or walk,          or TROT,


s: Does he sleep on a mattress, a bed, or a mat,          or a COT,


s: When he writes a copy in round-hand size,


s: Does he cross his T's and finish his I's              with a DOT,


s: Without a speck or a smudge or smear                    or BLOT,


s: Or do they, whenever they can, rebel,                   or PLOT,


s: If he catches them then, either old or young,


s: Do his people prig in the lanes or park?


s: Or even at times, when days are dark,                   GAROTTE?


s: Does he study the wants of his own dominion?


s: Or doesn't he care for public opinion                    a JOT,


s: To amuse his mind do his people show him


s: Pictures, or any one's last new poem,                    or WHAT,


s: At night if he suddenly screams and wakes,


s: Do they bring him only a few small cakes,               or a LOT,


s: Does he like his shawl to be marked with a stripe,      or a DOT,


s: Does he like to lie on his back in a boat


s: Like the lady who lived in that isle remote,            SHALLOTT,


s: Is his steward a Swiss or a Swede or a Russ,           or a SCOT,


s: Does he like to sit by the calm blue wave?


s: Does he drink small beer from a silver jug?


s: Or a bowl? or a glass? or a cup? or a mug?              or a POT,


s: Does he beat his wife with a gold-topped pipe,


s: When she lets the gooseberries grow too ripe,            or ROT,


s: Does he wear a white tie when he dines with friends,


s: And tie it neat in a bow with ends,                    or a KNOT,


s: Does he like new cream, and hate mince-pies?


s: When he looks at the sun does he wink his eyes,          or NOT,


s: Does he teach his subjects to roast and bake?


s: A tumbled down, and hurt his Arm, against a bit of wood,


s: B said. "My Boy, oh, do not cry; it cannot do you good!"


s: C said, "A Cup of Coffee hot can't do you any harm."


s: D said, "A Doctor should be fetched, and he would cure the arm."


s: E said, "An Egg beat up with milk would quickly make him well."


s: F said, "A Fish, if broiled, might cure, if only by the smell."


s: G said, "Green Gooseberry fool, the best of cures I hold."


s: H said, "His Hat should be kept on, to keep him from the cold."


s: I said, "Some Ice upon his head will make him better soon."


s: J said, "Some Jam, if spread on bread, or given in a spoon!"


s: K said, "A Kangaroo is here,--this picture let him see."


s: L said, "A Lamp pray keep alight, to make some barley tea."


s: M said, "A Mulberry or two might give him satisfaction."


s: O said, "An Owl might make him laugh, if only it would wink."


s: P said, "Some Poetry might be read aloud, to make him think."


s: Q said, "A Quince I recommend,--a Quince, or else a Quail."


s: S said, "A Song should now be sung, in hopes to make him laugh!"


s: T said, "A Turnip might avail, if sliced or cut in half!"


s: U said, "An Urn, with water hot, place underneath his chin!"


s: V said, "I'll stand upon a chair, and play a Violin!"


s: W said, "Some Whisky-Whizzgigs fetch, some marbles and a ball!"


s: X said, "Some double XX ale would be the best of all!"


s: Z said, "Here is a box of Zinc! Get in, my little master!


s: We'll shut you up! We'll nail you down! We will, my little


s: We think we've all heard quite enough of this your sad


s: "Surely the most beneficent and innocent of all books


s: yet produced is the _Book of Nonsense_, with its corollary


s: carols, inimitable and refreshing, and perfect in rhythm.


s: I really don't know any author to whom I am half so


s: grateful for my idle self as Edward Lear. I shall put


s: He has ears, and two eyes, and ten fingers,


s: He has many friends, lay men and clerical,


s: Calling out, "He's come out in his night-


s: Lear was a man to whom, as to Tennyson's Ulysses,


s: A hard-working life, checkered by the odd adventures which happen


s: career brightened by the high appreciation of unimpeachable


s: melodious--or, as he would say, _meloobious_--while to all these


s: Two Owls and a Hen, four Larks and a Wren,


s: Have all built their nests in my beard!'"


s: When they said, 'Does it buzz?' he replied, 'Yes, it does!


s: When they asked, 'Does it hurt?' he replied, 'No, it doesn't,


s: But I thought all the while 'twas a Hornet!'"


s: When the doors queezed her flat, she exclaimed, 'What of that?'


s: This courageous young person of Norway."


s: When they cried, 'Weedon Station!' she made no observation,


s: But thought she should go back to Sweden."


s: "They sailed to the Western Sea, they did,


s: And they bought an Owl, and a useful Cart,


s: And a pound of Rice, and a Cranberry Tart,


s: And they bought a Pig, and some green Jack-Daws,


s: Their heads are green, and their hands are blue,


s: And every one said, 'How tall they've grown!


s: For they've been to the Lakes, and the Torrible Zone,


s: And the great rock-walls grow dark and brown,


s: When the purple river rolls fast and dim,


s: have been the prevalent characteristics of the inhabitants of


s: following words: Runcible, propitious, dolomphious, borascible,


s: fizzgiggious, himmeltanious, tumble-dum-down, spongetaneous.


s: Quangle Wangle's Hat, and explain how the Quangle Wangle


s: was enabled at once to enlighten his five travelling companions


s: as to the true nature of the Co-operative Cauliflower.


s: Person of China, and what was the purpose for which the


s: Old Man of the Dargle purchased six barrels of Gargle?


s: state your theory, if you have any, as to the character and


s: Floppsikon Bear, and state by whom waterproof tubs


s: What bearing may we assume the foregoing couplet to have


s: There was an Old Derry down Derry, who loved to see little folks


s: So he made them a Book, and with laughter they shook


s: (The greater part of which were originally


s: That my nose is too long, you are certainly wrong!"


s: Whose Grandmother threatened to burn her;


s: But she seized on the Cat, and said, "Granny, burn that!


s: He ran up and down in his Grandmother's gown,


s: He sate on the stairs, eating apples and pears,


s: But they called out, "Oh, law! you're a horrid old bore!"


s: So they smashed that Old Man with a gong.


s: He spent all that money in onions and honey,


s: Who was thirsty, and called out for some beer;


s: But they brought it quite hot, in a small copper pot,


s: When they said, "Does it buzz?" he replied, "Yes, it does!


s: She twirled round and round, till she sank underground,


s: Which distressed all the people of Chertsey.


s: So she had it made sharp, and purchased a harp,


s: But he played day and night, till the "sarpint" took flight,


s: She climbed up a tree to examine the sea,


s: But declared she would never leave Portugal.


s: Whose conduct grew friskier and friskier;


s: He danced hornpipes and jigs, and ate thousands of figs,


s: When that did not agree, he took Camomile Tea,


s: When they said, "No, you ain't!" he was ready to faint,


s: Till at last with a hammer they silenced his clamor.


s: For while he was able, he slept on a table,


s: When they said, "You'll grow fatter!" he answered "What matter?"


s: But the length of its ears so promoted his fears,


s: Who rushed through a field of blue clover;


s: But some very large Bees stung his nose and his knees,


s: She sat on a stool and ate gooseberry-fool,


s: But in handing his daughter, he fell into the water,


s: He sang "High dum diddle," and played on the fiddle,


s: He purchased a steed, which he rode at full speed,


s: That the street door was partially closed;


s: But some very large Rats ate his coats and his hats,


s: When he'd eaten eighteen, he turned perfectly green,


s: Upon which he relinquished those habits.


s: When they said, "Does it fit?" he replied, "Not a bit!"


s: Whose daughters wore bottle-green veils:


s: They caught several Fish, which they put in a dish,


s: But they said, "Tell us whether your shoes are of leather,


s: Was so long that it reached to her toes;


s: So she hired an Old Lady, whose conduct was steady,


s: When the door squeezed her flat, she exclaimed, "What of that?"


s: He fed twenty sons upon nothing but buns,


s: But he cried, "With a needle I'll slay you, O beadle!"


s: She played several jigs to her Uncle's white Pigs:


s: He rushed up a Palm when the weather was calm,


s: When they said, "You 're a Guy!" he made no reply,


s: But knocked them all down with his poker.


s: Who was suddenly seized with the plague;


s: But they gave him some butter, which caused him to mutter,


s: But once, by mistake, in a stove she did bake


s: But a laudable cook fished him out with a hook,


s: Which he took with a spoon, by the light of the moon,


s: So he purchased some muffs, some furs, and some fluffs,


s: He gazed at the moon every evening in June,


s: But, though split quite in two, with some very strong glue


s: Till he cut off his thumbs, and said calmly, "This comes


s: When they said, "That's your toe," he replied, "Is it so?"


s: Till a great bit of muffin, on which he was stuffing,


s: He paid several cousins to catch them by dozens,


s: But in swallowing a dish that was quite full of Fish,


s: He was choked, that Old Man of the South.


s: But they said, "It ain't pleasant to see you at present,


s: When he said, "I will scratch it!" they gave him a hatchet,


s: She ran up a tree, and said "Fiddle-de-dee!"


s: He went with one prance from Turkey to France,


s: But one day, to his grief, she married a thief,


s: So he rushed up and down, till the sun made him brown,


s: When the flames burnt his book, to drinking he took,


s: When disturbed by the Crows, he abruptly arose,


s: Whereon, by a thorn her dress being torn,


s: When she said, "Let me out," he exclaimed, "Without doubt


s: You will pass all your life in that box."


s: So to keep him awake they fed him with cake,


s: But quickly snapt up he was once by a Puppy,


s: But he tore it in pieces, to give to his Nieces,


s: But she cried out, "Oh, lack! I have married a black!"


s: Which distressed that Old Man of Jamaica.


s: I will sit on this stile, and continue to smile,


s: Which may soften the heart of that Cow."


s: Some she killed with a thump, some she drowned at the pump,


s: So to make it look big he purchased a wig,


s: When they said, "Is it small?" he replied, "Not at all;


s: Who screamed so that no one could hush her;


s: Her screams were extreme,--no one heard such a scream


s: At the sound of each sweep she enraptured the deep,


s: He tore off his boots, and subsisted on roots,


s: But they all ate so much, and their conduct was such,


s: That it killed that Old Man of the East.


s: But when it was cold he relinquished his hold,


s: His gait and his waddle were held as a model


s: When they said, "Is it hot?" he replied, "No, it's not!"


s: But they said, "Never mind! you will fall off behind,


s: Till he once, by mistake, was mixed up in a cake,


s: So they set him to spin on his nose and his chin,


s: For stealing some pigs, some coats, and some wigs,


s: Whose conduct was strange and unmannerly;


s: He rushed down the Strand with a Pig in each hand,


s: When she lifted her hook, she exclaimed, "Only look!"


s: Whose praise all the world was a-telling;


s: She played on the harp, and caught several Carp,


s: That accomplished Young Lady of Welling.


s: But he screeched to his Wife, and she said, "Oh, my life!


s: Your death will be felt by all Tartary!"


s: But they said, "It's absurd to encourage this bird!"


s: So they smashed that Old Man of Whitehaven.


s: When they cried, "Weedon Station!" she made no observation,


s: But thought she should go back to Sweden.


s: They threw some large stones, which broke most of his bones,


s: And displeased that Old Person of Chester.


s: Till the Ape, one dark night, set the house all alight,


s: When they said, "How d' ye do?" he replied, "Who are you?"


s: And when he was found, they said he was drowned,


s: She walked seventy miles, and leaped fifteen stiles,


s: So she put it to boil by the aid of some oil,


s: When they said, "Are these caps?" she answered, "Perhaps!"


s: Who had twenty-five sons and one "darter;"


s: He fed them on Snails, and weighed them in scales,


s: But they all flew away at the closing of day,


s: Which relieved that Old Man and his nose.


s: When the day turned out fine, she ceased to repine,


s: Who possessed a large Cow, but he lost her;


s: But they said, "Don't you see she has run up a tree,


s: She dressed in a sack spickle-speckled with black,


s: When she found she was tired, she abruptly expired,


s: But its color and size so bedazzled her eyes,


s: That she very soon went back to Dorking.


s: So he sat on a Chair till he died of despair,


s: When he found he grew stiff, he jumped over the cliff,


s: So he sate on a chair with his feet in the air,


s: I have pulled day and night, till my hair has grown white,


s: He sat on a rail, and imbibed bitter ale,


s: Which refreshed that Old Man and his Owl.


s: When they said, "Sir, you'll fall!" he replied, "Not at all!"


s: But to make it more nice, he inserted some Mice,


s: Which refreshed that Old Person of Ewell.


s: So he tore off his hair, and behaved like a bear,


s: Two Owls and a Hen, four Larks and a Wren,


s: Have all built their nests in my beard."


s: When she opened them wide, people all turned aside,


s: She purchased some clogs, and some small spotty Dogs,


s: Came untied when the birds sate upon it;


s: But she said, "I don't care! all the birds in the air


s: They took some honey, and plenty of money


s: Oh! let us be married; too long we have tarried:


s: "Dear Pig, are you willing to sell for one shilling


s: So they took it away, and were married next day


s: They dined on mince and slices of quince,


s: And hand in hand, on the edge of the sand,


s: And I long to go out in the world beyond:


s: "I would sit quite still, and say nothing but 'Quack'


s: Perhaps, on the whole, it might bring me luck;


s: Which is, if you'll let me speak so bold,


s: Your feet are unpleasantly wet and cold,


s: And I bought four pairs of worsted socks,


s: And, to keep out the cold, I've bought a cloak;


s: But to balance me well, dear Duck, sit steady,


s: So away they went with a hop and a bound;


s: And they hopped the whole world three times round.


s: And, if you went, you'd see such sights!


s: And, more than all, the king and queen,--


s: Would please the shrimps and cockles round,


s: And reached the great Gromboolian Plain;


s: In spite of all their friends could say,


s: And when the sieve turned round and round,


s: And every one cried, "You'll all be drowned!"


s: They called aloud, "Our sieve ain't big;


s: But we don't care a button, we don't care a fig:


s: Their heads are green, and their hands are blue


s: "Oh! won't they be soon upset, you know?


s: For the sky is dark, and the voyage is long;


s: And, happen what may, it's extremely wrong


s: Their heads are green, and their hands are blue;


s: So, to keep them dry, they wrapped their feet


s: And they passed the night in a crockery-jar;


s: And each of them said, "How wise we are!


s: Though the sky be dark, and the voyage be long,


s: Yet we never can think we were rash or wrong,


s: When we live in a sieve and a crockery-jar!


s: And all night long, in the moonlight pale,


s: They sailed to the Western Sea, they did,--


s: And they bought an owl, and a useful cart,


s: And a pound of rice, and a cranberry-tart,


s: And they bought a pig, and some green jackdaws,


s: And in twenty years they all came back,--


s: And every one said, "How tall they've grown!


s: For they've been to the Lakes, and the Torrible Zone,


s: And they drank their health, and gave them a feast


s: The Nutcrackers sate by a plate on the table;


s: The Sugar-tongs sate by a plate at his side;


s: And the Nutcrackers said, "Don't you wish we were able


s: Along the blue hills and green meadows to ride?


s: Must we drag on this stupid existence forever,


s: While every one else takes his pleasure, and never


s: Seems happy unless he is riding a horse?


s: "Don't you think we could ride without being instructed,


s: Our legs are so long, and so aptly constructed,


s: I'm sure that an accident could not occur.


s: Let us all of a sudden hop down from the table,


s: And hustle downstairs, and each jump on a horse!


s: Shall we try? Shall we go? Do you think we are able?"


s: The Sugar-tongs answered distinctly, "Of course!"


s: So down the long staircase they hopped in a minute;


s: The Sugar-tongs snapped, and the Crackers said "Crack!"


s: The stable was open; the horses were in it:


s: Each took out a pony, and jumped on his back.


s: The Cat in a fright scrambled out of the doorway;


s: The Mice tumbled out of a bundle of hay;


s: The brown and white Rats, and the black ones from Norway,


s: Screamed out, "They are taking the horses away!"


s: The whole of the household was filled with amazement:


s: The Cups and the Saucers danced madly about;


s: The Plates and the Dishes looked out of the casement;


s: The Salt-cellar stood on his head with a shout;


s: The Spoons, with a clatter, looked out of the lattice;


s: The Soup-ladle peeped through a heap of veal-patties,


s: And squeaked with a ladle-like scream of surprise.


s: The Frying-pan said, "It's an awful delusion!"


s: The Tea-kettle hissed, and grew black in the face;


s: And they all rushed downstairs in the wildest confusion


s: To see the great Nutcracker-Sugar-tong race.


s: And out of the stable, with screamings and laughter


s: (Their ponies were cream-colored, speckled with brown),


s: The Nutcrackers first, and the Sugar-tongs after;


s: Rode all round the yard, and then all round the town.


s: They rode through the street, and they rode by the station;


s: They galloped away to the beautiful shore;


s: In silence they rode, and "made no observation,"


s: Save this: "We will never go back any more!"


s: And still you might hear, till they rode out of hearing,


s: The Sugar-tongs snap, and the Crackers say "Crack!"


s: Till, far in the distance their forms disappearing,


s: They faded away; and they never came back!


s: While, perched on tree or house or steeple,


s: And they each sang a song, ding-a-dong, ding-a-dong!


s: Mr. Poker he sate quite upright in the coach;


s: Miss Shovel was dressed all in black (with a brooch);


s: "O Shovely so lovely!" the Poker he sang,


s: Ding-a-dong, ding-a-dong! If you're pleased with my song,


s: When you scrape up the coals with a delicate sound,


s: Your nose is so shiny, your head is so round,


s: And your shape is so slender and bright!


s: "Alas! Mrs. Broom," sighed the Tongs in his song,


s: And my legs are so long,--ding-a-dong, ding-a-dong!--


s: Ah! fairest of creatures, when sweeping the room,


s: Must you needs be so cruel, you beautiful Broom,


s: Mrs. Broom and Miss Shovel together they sang,


s: Said the Shovel, "I'll certainly hit you a bang!"


s: Said the Broom, "And I'll sweep you away!"


s: So the coachman drove homeward as fast as he could,


s: But they put on the kettle, and little by little


s: Then they came to a country which was wholly covered with immense


s: The four children then entered into conversation with the


s: On which Violet, who was perfectly acquainted with the art of


s: There was a family of two old Parrots and seven young Parrots.


s: There was a family of two old Storks and seven young Storks.


s: There was a family of two old Geese and seven young Geese.


s: There was a family of two old Owls and seven young Owls.


s: There was a family of two old Cats and seven young Cats.


s: And there was a family of two old Fishes and seven young Fishes.


s: and screamed, and shrieked, and squealed,


s: more violently than ever; and after they


s: And that was the end of the seven young Storks.


s: On which they incautiously began to sing aloud,


s: And listen, oh! listen, oh! listen to me!"


s: On which the seven young Geese were greatly alarmed, and all of a


s: So that was the end of the seven young Geese.


s: On which a mouse answered, "Squeaky-peeky-weeky! yes, it is!"


s: So that was the end of the seven young Owls.


s: And that was the end of the seven young Guinea Pigs.


s: And this was the end of the seven young Cats.


s: And that was the end of the seven young Fishes.


s: Extract from "The Nonsense Gazette," for August, 1870.


s: When the whole is thus minced, brush it up hastily with a new


s: I was on my way from London to Guildford, in a railway carriage,


s: (The ladies looked puzzled, as indeed was I, the author.)


s: "Do you not know who is the writer of it?" asked the gentleman.


s: "The name is 'Edward Lear,'" said one of the ladies.


s: "But," said the lady, doubtingly, "here is a dedication to the


s: extinguisher's attention, I speedily reduced him to silence.


s: When disturbed by the mice, she appeased them with rice,


s: Whose feelings were wrung with compunction


s: When they said, "The Train's gone!" he exclaimed, "How forlorn!"


s: But remained on the rails of the Junction.


s: Large apples and pears, which he threw unawares


s: But they said, "If you choose to boil eggs in your shoes,


s: When they said, "Tell us why?" he made no reply,


s: When he said, "It's enough!" they only said, "Stuff!


s: But in fishing by night, it supported a light,


s: When he grew melancholy, they said, "His name's Polly,"


s: When they asked, "Are they pleasant?" he said, "Not at present!"


s: She nurs'd the small fishes, and washed all the dishes,


s: He sate in the dust, eating spiders and crust,


s: All the mice and the cats, and the snakes and the rats,


s: When he'd gone out a mile, he observ'd with a smile,


s: But he said, "Do not fail, if it happen to hail,