s: From desperate fighting with a little band


s: Against the powerful tyrants of our land,


s: To free our brethren in their own despite:


s: I wake from daydreams to this real night.


s: Thus, challenged by that warder sad and stern,


s: Each one responded with his countersign,


s: But lingered near until I heard no more,


s: And marked the closing of the massive door.


s: Of all things human which are strange and wild


s: This is perchance the wildest and most strange,


s: To those who haunt that sunless City's range;


s: That he bemoans himself for aye, repeating


s: How Time is deadly swift, how life is fleeting,


s: How naught is constant on the earth but change.


s: The hours are heavy on him and the days;


s: The burden of the months he scarce can bear;


s: To sleep through barren periods unaware,


s: Arousing at some longed-for date of pleasure;


s: Which having passed and yielded him small treasure,


s: Yet in his marvellous fancy he must make


s: Quick wings for Time, and see it fly from us;


s: This Time which crawleth like a monstrous snake,


s: Which creeps blindwormlike round the earth and ocean,


s: Distilling poison at each painful motion,


s: And seems condemned to circle ever thus.


s: And since he cannot spend and use aright


s: The little time here given him in trust,


s: Of foolish toil and trouble, strife and lust,


s: May have full scope; as surely is most just.


s: O nights that are as aeons of slow pain,


s: Through all the centuries and in all the regions,


s: Not of your speed and variance WE complain.


s: Weakness and weariness and nameless woes;


s: We do not claim renewed and endless life


s: When this which is our torment here shall close,


s: We yearn for speedy death in full fruition,


s: Large glooms were gathered in the mighty fane,


s: With tinted moongleams slanting here and there;


s: And all was hush: no swelling organ-strain,


s: No chant, no voice or murmuring of prayer;


s: No priests came forth, no tinkling censers fumed,


s: Around the pillars and against the walls


s: Leaned men and shadows; others seemed to brood


s: Perchance they were not a great multitude


s: Where one may count up every face he meets.


s: Self-occupied, doomstricken while attent.


s: And then we heard a voice of solemn stress


s: From the dark pulpit, and our gaze there met


s: Two eyes which burned as never eyes burned yet:


s: Burning beneath a broad and rugged brow;


s: And as black fir-groves in a large wind bow,


s: By that great sad voice deep and full were swayed:--


s: O melancholy Brothers, dark, dark, dark!


s: O battling in black floods without an ark!


s: My soul hath bled for you these sunless years,


s: With bitter blood-drops running down like tears:


s: Oh dark, dark, dark, withdrawn from joy and light!


s: My heart is sick with anguish for your bale;


s: Your woe hath been my anguish; yea, I quail


s: And I have searched the highths and depths, the scope


s: Of all our universe, with desperate hope


s: To find some solace for your wild unrest.


s: Witnessed by every dead and living thing;


s: Good tidings of great joy for you, for all:


s: There is no God; no Fiend with names divine


s: Made us and tortures us; if we must pine,


s: That living Person conscious and supreme,


s: Whom we must curse for cursing us with life;


s: Whom we must curse because the life he gave


s: Could not be killed by poison or the knife.


s: The grave's most holy peace is ever sure,


s: Nothing is of us but the mouldering flesh,


s: Whose elements dissolve and merge afresh


s: In earth, air, water, plants, and other men.


s: We finish thus; and all our wretched race


s: Shall finish with its cycle, and give place


s: To other beings with their own time-doom:


s: Has joined the mammoth in earth's tomb and womb.


s: Which never had for man a special clause


s: If toads and vultures are obscene to sight,


s: If tigers burn with beauty and with might,


s: All substance lives and struggles evermore


s: Through countless shapes continually at war,


s: All times and forces tended to that birth,


s: Not all the world could change or hinder it.


s: Of good or ill, of blessing or of curse;


s: O Brothers of sad lives!  they are so brief;


s: A few short years must bring us all relief:


s: Can we not bear these years of laboring breath?


s: But if you would not this poor life fulfil,


s: Lo, you are free to end it when you will,


s: Without the fear of waking after death.--


s: Thrilled through the vaulted aisles and died away;


s: The yearning of the tones which bade rejoice


s: As brooding on that "End it when you will."


s: Is charged with human feeling, human thought;


s: Each shout and cry and laugh, each curse and prayer,


s: Are breathed into it with our respiration


s: It is with our life fraught and overfraught.


s: So that no man there breathes earth's simple breath,


s: But nourishes warm life or hastens death


s: With joys and sorrows, health and foul disease,


s: Wisdom and folly, good and evil labours,


s: Incessant of his multitudinous neighbors;


s: That City's atmosphere is dark and dense,


s: And brooding on that "End it when you will;"


s: When keen as lightning through a muffled sky


s: Sprang forth a shrill and lamentable cry:--


s: The man speaks sooth, alas!  the man speaks sooth:


s: We have no personal life beyond the grave;


s: There is no God; Fate knows nor wrath nor ruth:


s: Can I find here the comfort which I crave?


s: One few years' term of gracious human life:


s: The splendours of the intellect's advance,


s: The sweetness of the home with babes and wife;


s: The social pleasures with their genial wit:


s: The glories of the worlds of nature, lit


s: The rapture of mere being, full of health;


s: The careless childhood and the ardent youth,


s: The strenuous manhood winning various wealth,


s: The reverend age serene with life's long truth:


s: The storied memories of the times of old,


s: The patient tracking of the world's great plan


s: Through sequences and changes myriadfold.


s: This chance was never offered me before;


s: Blank, blank for me the infinite To-come.


s: And this sole chance was frustrate from my birth,


s: So racks me that I sigh for senseless death.


s: My wine of life is poison mixed with gall,


s: I worse than lose the years which are my all:


s: What can console me for the loss supreme?


s: Speak not of comfort where no comfort is,


s: Speak not at all: can words make foul things fair?


s: Our life's a cheat, our death a black abyss:


s: This vehement voice came from the northern aisle


s: Rapid and shrill to its abrupt harsh close;


s: And none gave answer for a certain while,


s: For words must shrink from these most wordless woes;


s: With humid eyes and thoughtful drooping head:--


s: My Brother, my poor Brothers, it is thus;


s: This life itself holds nothing good for us,


s: And we knew nothing of it ere our birth,


s: And shall know nothing when consigned to earth:


s: I ponder these thoughts and they comfort me.


s: How the moon triumphs through the endless nights!


s: How the stars throb and glitter as they wheel


s: Their thick processions of supernal lights


s: Around the blue vault obdurate as steel!


s: And men regard with passionate awe and yearning


s: The mighty marching and the golden burning,


s: And think the heavens respond to what they feel.


s: Boats gliding like dark shadows of a dream


s: The quivering moonbridge on the deep black stream;


s: Cold windows kindle their dead glooms of glass


s: To restless crystals; cornice dome and column


s: Emerge from chaos in the splendour solemn;


s: Like faery lakes gleam lawns of dewy grass.


s: With such a living light these dead eyes shine,


s: These eyes of sightless heaven, that as we gaze


s: Or cold majestic scorn in their pure rays:


s: Fond man!  they are not haughty, are not tender;


s: There is no heart or mind in all their splendour,


s: They thread mere puppets all their marvellous maze.


s: If we could near them with the flight unflown,


s: We should but find them worlds as sad as this,


s: Enringed by planet worlds as much amiss:


s: They wax and wane through fusion and confusion;


s: The spheres eternal are a grand illusion,


s: And reached a spot whence three close lanes led down,


s: Beneath thick trees and hedgerows winding forth


s: Like deep brook channels, deep and dark and lown:


s: The dull grey south showed one vague blur of white.


s: I took the left-hand path and slowly trod


s: Its earthen footpath, brushing as I went


s: With heavy languor, and my frame downbent,


s: With infinite sleepless weariness outworn,


s: So many nights I thus had paced forlorn.


s: Of something crawling in the lane below;


s: It seemed a wounded creature prostrate there


s: That sobbed with pangs in making progress slow,


s: The hind limbs stretched to push, the fore limbs then


s: To drag; for it would die in its own den.


s: It stopped in its sore travail and half-turned,


s: Leaning upon its right, and raised its head,


s: And with the left hand twitched back as in ire


s: Long grey unreverend locks befouled with mire.


s: A haggard filthy face with bloodshot eyes,


s: He gasped all trembling, What, you want my prize?


s: You leave, to rob me, wine and lust and gold


s: Have traced my sacred secret of the clue?


s: You think that I am weak and must submit


s: Yet I but scratch you with this poisoned blade,


s: That false fierce greedy heart.  Betrayed!  betrayed!


s: And you are forthwith shrivelled up like grass.


s: And then with sudden change, Take thought!  take thought!


s: If you could find, it would avail you naught;


s: Seek elsewhere on the pathway of your own:


s: Two lanes diverge up yonder from this lane;


s: My thin blood marks the long length of their soil;


s: Such clue I left, who sought my clue in vain:


s: My hands and knees are worn both flesh and bone;


s: To find the long-lost broken golden thread


s: If you but go your own way.  And I said,


s: Whereunto leadeth this lost thread of gold.


s: And so you know it not!  he hissed with scorn;


s: I feared you, imbecile!  It leads me back


s: From this accursed night without a morn,


s: And through the deserts which have else no track,


s: And through vast wastes of horror-haunted time,


s: Without a past, love-cherished and secure;


s: Which if it saw this loathsome present Me,


s: Would plunge its face into the pillowing breast,


s: And scream abhorrence hard to lull to rest.


s: He turned to grope; and I retiring brushed


s: Thin shreds of gossamer from off my face,


s: And mused, His life would grow, the germ uncrushed;


s: And hide his elements in that large womb


s: And even thus, what weary way were planned,


s: To seek oblivion through the far-off gate


s: Of birth, when that of death is close at hand!


s: For this is law, if law there be in Fate:


s: What never has been, yet may have its when;


s: The thing which has been, never is again.


s: With ebb and flood from the remote sea-tides


s: Vague-sounding through the City's sleepless sleep,


s: For night by night some lorn wretch overweary,


s: And shuddering from the future yet more dreary,


s: As if by some blind and sudden frenzy hurled;


s: Glides drifting down into the desert ocean,


s: To starve or sink from out the desert world.


s: They perish from their suffering surely thus,


s: For none beholding them attempts to save,


s: He may seek refuge in the self-same wave;


s: Some hour when tired of ever-vain endurance


s: Impatience will forerun the sweet assurance


s: When this poor tragic-farce has palled us long,


s: To fill our so-short roles out right or wrong;


s: To see what shifts are yet in the dull play


s: For our illusion; to refrain from grieving


s: Dear foolish friends by our untimely leaving:


s: But those asleep at home, how blest are they!


s: What matters one brief night of dreary pain?


s: And all sad scenes and thoughts and feelings vanish


s: In that sweet sleep no power can ever banish,


s: That one best sleep which never wakes again.


s: And leaned against the shaft; for broad moonlight


s: O'erflowed the peacefulness of cloistered space,


s: A shore of shadow slanting from the right:


s: The great cathedral's western front stood there,


s: A wave-worn rock in that calm sea of air.


s: Two figures faced each other, large, austere;


s: A couchant sphinx in shadow to the breast,


s: An angel standing in the moonlight clear;


s: They were not dwarfed beneath that mass enorm.


s: The angel's hands, as prompt to smite, were held;


s: Whose front was set at level gaze which took


s: No heed of aught, a solemn trance-like look.


s: My eyelids sank in stupor, that dull swoon


s: Which drugs and with a leaden mantle drapes


s: The outworn to worse weariness.  But soon


s: A sharp and clashing noise the stillness broke,


s: The angel's wings had fallen, stone on stone,


s: And lay there shattered; hence the sudden sound:


s: Now watched the sphinx with that regard profound;


s: The sphinx unchanged looked forthright, as aware


s: The warrior's sword lay broken at his feet:


s: An unarmed man with raised hands impotent


s: Now stood before the sphinx, which ever kept


s: My eyelids sank in spite of wonder grown;


s: The man had fallen forward, stone on stone,


s: And lay there shattered, with his trunkless head


s: Between the monster's large quiescent paws,


s: Beneath its grand front changeless as life's laws.


s: The moon had circled westward full and bright,


s: And made the temple-front a mystic dream,


s: And bathed the whole enclosure with its light,


s: The sworded angel's wrecks, the sphinx supreme:


s: Whose vision seemed of infinite void space.


s: Stands out a level upland bleak and bare,


s: From which the city east and south and west


s: Sinks gently in long waves; and throned there


s: With cheek on clenched left hand, the forearm's might


s: Across a clasped book in her lap the right


s: With full set eyes, but wandering in thick mazes


s: Of sombre thought beholds no outward sight.


s: Words cannot picture her; but all men know


s: That solemn sketch the pure sad artist wrought


s: Three centuries and threescore years ago,


s: With phantasies of his peculiar thought:


s: The instruments of carpentry and science


s: Scattered about her feet, in strange alliance


s: With the keen wolf-hound sleeping undistraught;


s: Scales, hour-glass, bell, and magic-square above;


s: The grave and solid infant perched beside,


s: With open winglets that might bear a dove,


s: Robustness of her earth-born strength and pride;


s: And with those wings, and that light wreath which seems


s: To mock her grand head and the knotted frown


s: Of  forehead charged with baleful thoughts and dreams,


s: The household bunch of keys, the housewife's gown


s: As if a shell of burnished metal frigid,


s: The feet thick-shod to tread all weakness down;


s: The comet hanging o'er the waste dark seas,


s: Beyond the village with the masts and trees;


s: The snaky imp, dog-headed, from the Pit,


s: Bearing upon its batlike leathern pinions


s: Her name unfolded in the sun's dominions,


s: The "MELENCOLIA" that transcends all wit.


s: Thus has the artist copied her, and thus


s: Fronting the dreadful mysteries of Time,


s: Of the day setting on her baffled prime.


s: Baffled and beaten back she works on still,


s: Weary and sick of soul she works the more,


s: The hands shall fashion and the brain shall pore,


s: And all her sorrow shall be turned to labour,


s: Till Death the friend-foe piercing with his sabre


s: That mighty heart of hearts ends bitter war.


s: But as if blacker night could dawn on night,


s: With tenfold gloom on moonless night unstarred,


s: A sense more tragic than defeat and blight,


s: More desperate than strife with hope debarred,


s: To sense that every struggle brings defeat


s: Because Fate holds no prize to crown success;


s: That none can pierce the vast black veil uncertain


s: Because there is no light beyond the curtain;


s: Titanic from her high throne in the north,


s: Over the river with its isles and bridges,


s: The marsh and moorland, to the stern rock-bridges,


s: The moving moon and stars from east to west


s: Shadows and gleams glide round her solemn rest.


s: Her subjects often gaze up to her there:


s: The strong to drink new strength of iron endurance,


s: The weak new terrors; all, renewed assurance


s: . . . Parts of this poem have been printed in "The North American


s: The sun goes down in a cold pale flare of light.


s: The trees grow dark: the shadows lean to the east:


s: And lights wink out through the windows, one by one.


s: A clamor of frosty sirens mourns at the night.


s: Pale slate-grey clouds whirl up from the sunken sun.


s: And the wandering one, the inquisitive dreamer of dreams,


s: The eternal asker of answers, stands in the street,


s: And lifts his palms for the first cold ghost of rain.


s: The purple lights leap down the hill before him.


s: 'I will ask them all, I will ask them all their dreams,


s: I will hold my light above them and seek their faces.


s: I will hear them whisper, invisible in their veins . . .'


s: The eternal asker of answers becomes as the darkness,


s: Or as a wind blown over a myriad forest,


s: Or as the numberless voices of long-drawn rains.


s: We hear him and take him among us, like a wind of music,


s: Like the ghost of a music we have somewhere heard;


s: We crowd through the streets in a dazzle of pallid lamplight,


s: We pour in a sinister wave, ascend a stair,


s: With laughter and cry, and word upon murmured word;


s: We flow, we descend, we turn . . . and the eternal dreamer


s: Moves among us like light, like evening air . . .


s: Good-night!  Good-night!  Good-night!  We go our ways,


s: The rain runs over the pavement before our feet,


s: We walk, we run, we ride.  We turn our faces


s: Our hands are hot and raw with the stones we have laid,


s: We have built a tower of stone high into the sky,


s: Our hands are light, they are singing with emptiness.


s: Our souls are light; they have shaken a burden of hours . . .


s: What did we build it for?  Was it all a dream? . . .


s: Ghostly above us in lamplight the towers gleam . . .


s: And after a while they will fall to dust and rain;


s: Or else we will tear them down with impatient hands;


s: And hew rock out of the earth, and build them again.


s: One, from his high bright window in a tower,


s: And sees the advancing curtain of the shower


s: Splashing its silver on roofs and walls:


s: Sees how, swift as a shadow, it crosses the city,


s: And murmurs beyond far walls to the sea,


s: Leaving a glimmer of water in the dark canyons,


s: One, from his high bright window, looking down,


s: Peers like a dreamer over the rain-bright town,


s: The western windows flame in the sun's last flare,


s: Looking down from a window high in a wall


s: Lifting our pallid faces towards the rain,


s: Searching the sky, and going our ways again,


s: Standing in doorways, waiting under the trees . . .


s: There, in the high bright window he dreams, and sees


s: What we are blind to,--we who mass and crowd


s: From wall to wall in the darkening of a cloud.


s: The gulls drift slowly above the city of towers,


s: Over the roofs to the darkening sea they fly;


s: Night falls swiftly on an evening of rain.


s: The towers reach higher and blacker against the sky.


s: One, where the pale sea foamed at the yellow sand,


s: Turned to the city of towers as evening fell;


s: And slowly walked by the darkening road toward it;


s: And saw how the towers darkened against the sky;


s: And across the distance heard the toll of a bell.


s: Along the darkening road he hurried alone,


s: And thought how the streets were hoarse with a tide of people,


s: With clamor of voices, and numberless faces . . .


s: And it seemed to him, of a sudden, that he would drown


s: And he hurried towards the city, to enter there.


s: Along the darkening road, between tall trees


s: That made a sinister whisper, loudly he walked.


s: Behind him, sea-gulls dipped over long grey seas.


s: Before him, numberless lovers smiled and talked.


s: And death was observed with sudden cries,


s: And the trees grew taller and blacker against the skies


s: Up high black walls, up sombre terraces,


s: Clinging like luminous birds to the sides of cliffs,


s: The yellow lights went climbing towards the sky.


s: From high black walls, gleaming vaguely with rain,


s: Each yellow light looked down like a golden eye.


s: They trembled from coign to coign, and tower to tower,


s: Along high terraces quicker than dream they flew.


s: And some of them steadily glowed, and some soon vanished,


s: And behind them all the ghosts of thoughts went moving,


s: From chair to mirror, from mirror to fire;


s: From some, the light was scarcely more than a gloom:


s: And there was one, beneath black eaves, who thought,


s: Combing with lifted arms her golden hair,


s: Of the lover who hurried towards her through the night;


s: And there was one who dreamed of a sudden death


s: And there was one who turned from clamoring streets,


s: And walked in lamplit gardens among black trees,


s: And thought with terror how stones and roots would freeze


s: And she hurried back, as snow fell, mixed with rain,


s: To jostle beneath blue lamps along the street;


s: And lost herself in the warm bright coiling dream,


s: With a sound of murmuring voices and shuffling feet.


s: And one, from his high bright window looking down


s: On luminous chasms that cleft the basalt town,


s: Desired to leave his dream, descend from the tower,


s: And drown in waves of shouts and laughter and cries.


s: The snow floats down upon us, mingled with rain . . .


s: It eddies around pale lilac lamps, and falls


s: We were all born of flesh, in a flare of pain,


s: We do not remember the red roots whence we rose,


s: But we know that we rose and walked, that after a while


s: The snow floats down upon us, we turn, we turn,


s: Through gorges filled with light we sound and flow . . .


s: One is struck down and hurt, we crowd about him,


s: We bear him away, gaze after his listless body;


s: But whether he lives or dies we do not know.


s: One of us sings in the street, and we listen to him;


s: The words ring over us like vague bells of sorrow.


s: He sings of a house he lived in long ago.


s: It is strange; this house of dust was the house I lived in;


s: The house you lived in, the house that all of us know.


s: And coiling slowly about him, and laughing at him,


s: A mournful echo of other times and places,


s: And follow a dream . . . a dream that will not stay.


s: Down long broad flights of lamplit stairs we flow;


s: Noisy, in scattered waves, crowding and shouting;


s: The gardens extend before us . . .  We spread out swiftly;


s: Trees are above us, and darkness.  The canyon fades . . .


s: And we recall, with a gleaming stab of sadness,


s: Of a world we came from, a world of sun-blue hills . . .


s: A black wood whispers around us, green eyes gleam;


s: Someone cries in the forest, and someone kills.


s: We flow to the east, to the white-lined shivering sea;


s: We reach to the west, where the whirling sun went down;


s: We close our eyes to music in bright cafees.


s: We diverge from clamorous streets to streets that are silent.


s: We loaf where the wind-spilled fountain plays.


s: And, growing tired, we turn aside at last,


s: Remember our secret selves, seek out our towers,


s: Lay weary hands on the banisters, and climb;


s: Climbing, each, to his little four-square dream


s: Of love or lust or beauty or death or crime.


s: Over the darkened city, the city of towers,


s: Over the gleaming terraced roofs, the huddled towers,


s: Over a somnolent whisper of loves and hates,


s: The slow wind flows, drearily streams and falls,


s: With a mournful sound down rain-dark walls.


s: On one side purples the lustrous dusk of the sea,


s: On one side sleep the plains, with heaped-up hills.


s: Oaks and beeches whisper in rings about it.


s: Above the trees are towers where dread bells beat.


s: The fisherman draws his streaming net from the sea


s: And sails toward the far-off city, that seems


s: The dark bow plunges to foam on blue-black waves,


s: And shrill rain seethes like a ghostly music about him


s: Rain with a shrill sings on the lapsing waves;


s: Like a shadow of shifting silver it crosses the city;


s: The lamps in the streets are streamed with rain;


s: And sparrows complain beneath deep eaves,


s: The sea-gulls, blowing from tower to lower tower,


s: Skim with the driven rain to the rising sea-sound


s: . . . Hearing great rain above me, I now remember


s: A girl who stood by the door and shut her eyes:


s: Her pale cheeks glistened with rain, she stood and shivered.


s: Into a forest of silver she vanished slowly . . .


s: Voices clear and silvery, voices of raindrops,--


s: 'We struck with silver claws, we struck her down.


s: We are the ghosts of the singing furies . . . '


s: A chorus of elfin voices blowing about me


s: Weaves to a babel of sound.  Each cries a secret.


s: I run among them, reach out vain hands, and drown.


s: 'I am the one who stood beside you and smiled,


s: Thinking your face so strangely young . . . '


s: 'I am the one who loved you but did not dare.'


s: 'I am the one you followed through crowded streets,


s: The one who escaped you, the one with red-gleamed hair.'


s: Senseless before you, hearing a certain bell:


s: A bell that broke great memories in my brain.'


s: 'I am the one who passed unnoticed before you,


s: 'I am the one who suddenly cried, beholding


s: The face of a certain man on the dazzling screen.


s: They wrote me that he was dead.  It was long ago.


s: I walked in the streets for a long while, hearing nothing,


s: And returned to see it again.  And it was so.'


s: Weave, weave, weave, you streaks of rain!


s: Thousands of faces rise and vanish before me.


s: 'I am the one who rode beside you, blinking


s: Tempests of music swept me: I was thinking


s: Of the gorgeous promise of certain nights:


s: Of the woman who suddenly smiled at me this day,


s: Smiled in a certain delicious sidelong way,


s: Her hands are whiter than snow on midnight water.


s: Her throat is golden and full of golden laughter,


s: Her eyes are strange as the stealth of the moon


s: She runs among whistling leaves; I hurry after;


s: She dances in dreams over white-waved water;


s: Her body is white and fragrant and cool,


s: Magnolia petals that float on a white-starred pool . . .


s: I have dreamed of her, dreaming for many nights


s: Of broken webs of silver, heavily falling


s: Between my hands and their white desire:


s: And dark-leaved boughs, edged with a golden radiance,


s: I dream that I walk with her beneath high trees,


s: She is blown aloft on wind, I catch at leaves,


s: And I hear a crashing of terrible rocks flung down,


s: And shattering trees and cracking walls,


s: And a net of intense white flame roars over the town,


s: And someone cries; and darkness falls . . .


s: But now she has leaned and smiled at me,


s: Her eyes have kissed me, my body is turned to light;


s: I shall dream to her secret heart tonight . . . '


s: He rises and moves away, he says no word,


s: He folds his evening paper and turns away;


s: I rush through the dark with rows of lamplit faces;


s: Fire bells peal, and some of us turn to listen,


s: And some sit motionless in their accustomed places.


s: Cold rain lashes the car-roof, scurries in gusts,


s: Streams down the windows in waves and ripples of lustre;


s: The lamps in the streets are distorted and strange.


s: Someone takes his watch from his pocket and yawns.


s: One peers out in the night for the place to change.


s: Rain . . . rain . . . rain . . . we are buried in rain,


s: It will rain forever, the swift wheels hiss through water,


s: Pale sheets of water gleam in the windy street.


s: The pealing of bells is lost in a drive of rain-drops.


s: Remote and hurried the great bells beat.


s: 'I am the one whom life so shrewdly betrayed,


s: Misfortune dogs me, it always hunted me down.


s: Yet now she has gone in silence and said no word.


s: How can we face these dazzling things, I ask you?


s: There is no use: we cry: and are not heard.


s: 'They cover a body with roses . . . I shall not see it . . .


s: Must one return to the lifeless walls of a city


s: His eyes are closed, his lips press tightly together.


s: Wheels hiss beneath us.  He yields us our desire.


s: 'No, do not stare so--he is weak with grief,


s: He cannot face you, he turns his eyes aside;


s: I suffered this.  I know.  It was long ago . . .


s: He closes his eyes and drowns in death again.'


s: The wind hurls blows at the rain-starred glistening windows,


s: The wind shrills down from the half-seen walls.


s: We flow on the mournful wind in a dream of dying;


s: Midnight; bells toll, and along the cloud-high towers


s: The yellow windows darken, the shades are drawn,


s: In thousands of rooms we sleep, we await the dawn,


s: We cry aloud with terror, half rise, or seem


s: Midnight . . . the last of shattering bell-notes falls.


s: A rush of silence whirls over the cloud-high towers,


s: 'The bells have just struck twelve: I should be sleeping.


s: But I cannot delay any longer to write and tell you.


s: She died--you know the way.  Just as we planned.


s: Smiling upon the outstretched fatal hand . . .'


s: He folds his letter, steps softly down the stairs.


s: The doors are closed and silent.  A gas-jet flares.


s: His shadow disturbs a shadow of balustrades.


s: The door swings shut behind.  Night roars above him.


s: Blowing the water that gleams in the street;


s: In the dark alley, an old tree cracks and falls,


s: Lamps blow down with a crash and tinkle of glass . . .


s: Darkness whistles . . . Wild hours pass . . .


s: And those whom sleep eludes lie wide-eyed, hearing


s: The young girl hears the roar in her sleep, and dreams


s: That her lover is caught in a burning tower,


s: She clutches the pillow, she gasps for breath, she screams . . .


s: And then by degrees her breath grows quiet and slow,


s: Of colored lanterns balancing under trees,


s: And beneath the lanterns a motionless face she sees,


s: Golden with lamplight, smiling, serene . . .


s: The leaves are a pale and glittering green,


s: The sound of horns blows over the trampled grass,


s: The face smiles closer to hers, she tries to lean


s: Backward, away, the eyes burn close and strange,


s: It is her lover, she no longer desires to resist,


s: She closes her eyes, and melts in a seethe of flame . . .


s: Wind, wind, wind . . .  Wind in an enormous brain


s: Blowing dark thoughts like fallen leaves . . .


s: It dashes the leaves on walls, it whirls then again;


s: And the enormous sleeper vaguely and stupidly dreams


s: And desires to stir, to resist a ghost of pain.


s: One, whom the city imprisoned because of his cunning,


s: Of tumult and wind.  He files through the rusted bar,


s: Leans his face to the rain, laughs up at the night,


s: Slides down the knotted sheet, swings over the wall,


s: To fall to the street with a cat-like fall,


s: Slinks round a quavering rim of windy light,


s: Leaving his empty cell for the pallor of dawn . . .


s: The mother whose child was buried to-day


s: Turns her face to the window; her face is grey;


s: And all her body is cold with the coldness of rain.


s: He would have grown as easily as a tree,


s: He would have spread a pleasure of shade above her,


s: He would have been his father again . . .


s: His growth was ended by a freezing invisible shadow.


s: She lies, and does not move, and is stabbed by the rain.


s: We dream we are clouds and stars, blown in a stream:


s: We reach vague-gesturing hands, we lift our heads,


s: Hear sounds far off,--and dream, with quivering breath,


s: Our curious separate ways through life and death.


s: The white fog creeps from the cold sea over the city,


s: And settles among the roofs, the pale grey walls.


s: Curls like a dream among the motionless trees


s: The fog slips ghostlike into a thousand rooms,


s: Spins in an atomy dance round misty street lamps;


s: And blows in cloudy waves over open spaces . . .


s: And one from his high window, looking down,


s: And thinks its island towers are like a dream . . .


s: It seems an enormous sleeper, within whose brain


s: Laborious shadows revolve and break and gleam.


s: The round red sun heaves darkly out of the sea.


s: The walls and towers are warmed and gleam.


s: Sounds go drowsily up from streets and wharves.


s: The city stirs like one that is half in dream.


s: And the mist flows up by dazzling walls and windows,


s: We gaze at the pale grey lustrous sea a moment,


s: And face our thousand devious secret mornings . . .


s: And do not see how the pale mist, slowly ascending,


s: Shaped by the sun, shines like a white-robed dreamer


s: There, like one who gazes into a crystal,


s: He broods upon our city with sombre eyes;


s: He sees our secret fears vaguely unfolding,


s: Each gleaming point of light is like a seed


s: Each cloud becomes a rapidly dimming face,


s: Each hurrying face records its strange desires.


s: We descend our separate stairs toward the day,


s: Merge in the somnolent mass that fills the street,


s: Lift our eyes to the soft blue space of sky,


s: And walk by the well-known walls with accustomed feet.


s: More towers must yet be built--more towers destroyed--


s: And he must seek his bread in high pale sunlight


s: With gulls about him, and clouds just over his eyes . . .


s: And so he did not mention his dream of falling


s: But drank his coffee in silence, and heard in his ears


s: That horrible whistle of wind, and felt his breath


s: Sucked out of him, and saw the tower flash by


s: And the small tree swell beneath him . . .


s: He patted his boy on the head, and kissed his wife,


s: Looked quickly around the room, to remember it,--


s: And so went out . . .  For once, he forgot his pail.


s: Something had changed--but it was not the street--


s: The street was just the same--it was himself.


s: Puddles flashed in the sun.  In the pawn-shop door


s: The same old black cat winked green amber eyes;


s: The butcher stood by his window tying his apron;


s: The same men walked beside him, smoking pipes,


s: He would not yield, he thought, and walk more slowly,


s: As if he knew for certain he walked to death:


s: But with his usual pace,--deliberate, firm,


s: Looking about him calmly, watching the world,


s: Taking his ease . . .  Yet, when he thought again


s: Of the same dream, now dreamed three separate times,


s: Always the same, and heard that whistling wind,


s: And saw the windows flashing upward past him,--


s: He slowed his pace a little, and thought with horror


s: How monstrously that small tree thrust to meet him! . . .


s: He slowed his pace a little and remembered his wife.


s: Was forty, then, too old for work like this?


s: Why should it be?  He'd never been afraid--


s: His eye was sure, his hand was steady . . .


s: He walked more slowly, and looked along the roofs,


s: All built by men, and saw the pale blue sky;


s: And suddenly he was dizzy with looking at it,


s: It seemed the color of terror, of speed, of death . . .


s: He lowered his eyes to the stones, he walked more slowly;


s: His thoughts were blown and scattered like leaves;


s: He thought of the pail . . . Why, then, was it forgotten?


s: Then, just as he was grouping his thoughts again


s: About that drug-store corner, under an arc-lamp,


s: Where first he met the girl whom he would marry,--


s: That blue-eyed innocent girl, in a soft blouse,--


s: He waved his hand for signal, and up he went


s: In the dusty chute that hugged the wall;


s: Above the tree; from girdered floor to floor;


s: Above the flattening roofs, until the sea


s: Lay wide and waved before him . . . And then he stepped


s: And walked along it, feeling it sing and tremble;


s: And looking down one instant, saw the tree


s: Just as he dreamed it was; and looked away,


s: And up again, feeling his blood go wild.


s: He gave the signal; the long girder swung


s: Closer to him, dropped clanging into place,


s: Almost pushing him off.  Pneumatic hammers


s: Began their madhouse clatter, the white-hot rivets


s: Were tossed from below and deftly caught in pails;


s: He signalled again, and wiped his mouth, and thought


s: A place so high in the air should be more quiet.


s: The tree, far down below, teased at his eyes,


s: Teased at the corners of them, until he looked,


s: And felt his body go suddenly small and light;


s: Felt his brain float off like a dwindling vapor;


s: And heard a whistle of wind, and saw a tree


s: Come plunging up to him, and thought to himself,


s: 'By God--I'm done for now, the dream was right . . .'


s: The warm sun dreams in the dust, the warm sun falls


s: The trees in the park exhale a ghost of rain;


s: We go from door to door in the streets again,


s: Talking, laughing, dreaming, turning our faces,


s: We crowd, not knowing why, around a gate,


s: A stretcher is carried out, voices are stilled,


s: We watch its roof flash by, hear someone say


s: 'A man fell off the building and was killed--


s: Fell right into a barrel . . .'  We turn again


s: Among the frightened eyes of white-faced men,


s: And go our separate ways, each bearing with him


s: A thing he tries, but vainly, to forget,--


s: A sickened crowd, a stretcher red and wet.


s: A hurdy-gurdy sings in the crowded street,


s: The golden notes skip over the sunlit stones,


s: The sun seems warmer, the winding street more bright,


s: Sparrows come whirring down in a cloud of light.


s: We bear our dreams among us, bear them all,


s: Like hurdy-gurdy music they rise and fall,


s: The wandering lover dreams of his lover's mouth,


s: The broker smokes his pipe, and sees a fortune.


s: 'Draw three cards, and I will tell your future . . .


s: Rest your palms upon them, stare at the crystal,


s: And think of time . . . My father was a clown,


s: And she was gotten with child in a strange way;


s: And I was born in a cold eclipse of the moon,


s: With the future in my eyes as clear as day.'


s: I sit before the gold-embroidered curtain


s: And think her face is like a wrinkled desert.


s: The crystal burns in lamplight beneath my eyes.


s: A dragon slowly coils on the scaly curtain.


s: Upon a scarlet cloth a white skull lies.


s: 'Your hand is on the hand that holds three lilies.


s: I see a dark girl here who once betrayed you.


s: 'There was a man who came intent to kill you,


s: And hid behind a door and waited for you;


s: There was a woman who smiled at you and lied.


s: There was a golden girl who loved you, begged you,


s: 'There is a ghost of murder in your blood--


s: And here is danger--a woman with sea-green eyes,


s: The words hiss into me, like raindrops falling


s: On sleepy fire . . . She smiles a meaning smile.


s: Suspicion eats my brain; I ask a question;


s: Something is creeping at me, something vile;


s: And suddenly on the wall behind her head


s: I see a monstrous shadow strike and spread,


s: The lamp puffs out, a great blow crashes down.


s: I plunge through the curtain, run through dark to the street,


s: The shades are drawn, the door is locked behind me.


s: Behind the door I hear a hammer sounding.


s: I mingle among the crowds; my heart is pounding;


s: You do not guess the adventure I have had! . . .


s: Yet you, too, all have had your dark adventures,


s: Your sudden adventures, or strange, or sweet . . .


s: My peril goes out from me, is blown among you.


s: We loiter, dreaming together, along the street.


s: Round white clouds roll slowly above the housetops,


s: Over the clear red roofs they flow and pass.


s: A flock of pigeons rises with blue wings flashing,


s: Rises with whistle of wings, hovers an instant,


s: And settles slowly again on the tarnished grass.


s: And one old man looks down from a dusty window


s: And sees the pigeons circling about the fountain


s: And desires once more to walk among those trees.


s: Lovers walk in the noontime by that fountain.


s: Pigeons dip their beaks to drink from the water.


s: The light wind blows to his ears a sound of laughter,


s: Young men shuffle their feet, loaf in the sunlight;


s: A girl's laugh rings like a silver bell.


s: But clearer than all these sounds is a sound he hears


s: More in his secret heart than in his ears,--


s: A hammer's steady crescendo, like a knell.


s: He hears the snarl of pineboards under the plane,


s: The rhythmic saw, and then the hammer again,--


s: Playing with delicate strokes that sombre scale . . .


s: And the fountain dwindles, the sunlight seems to pale.


s: Time is a dream, he thinks, a destroying dream;


s: It lays great cities in dust, it fills the seas;


s: It covers the face of beauty, and tumbles walls.


s: Where was the woman he loved?  Where was his youth?


s: Where was the dream that burned his brain like fire?


s: Even a dream grows grey at last and falls.


s: He opened his book once more, beside the window,


s: And read the printed words upon that page.


s: The sunlight touched his hand; his eyes moved slowly,


s: 'Death is never an ending, death is a change;


s: Death is beautiful, for death is strange;


s: Death is one dream out of another flowing;


s: By sweet transition from key to richer key.


s: Death is a meeting place of sea and sea.'


s: She turned her head on the pillow, and cried once more.


s: And drawing a shaken breath, and closing her eyes,


s: To shut out, if she could, this dingy room,


s: The wigs and costumes scattered around the floor,--


s: Yellows and greens in the dark,--she walked again


s: Those nightmare streets which she had walked so often . . .


s: Here, at a certain corner, under an arc-lamp,


s: Blown by a bitter wind, she stopped and looked


s: In through the brilliant windows of a drug-store,


s: And wondered if she dared to ask for poison:


s: But it was late, few customers were there,


s: The eyes of all the clerks would freeze upon her,


s: And she would wilt, and cry . . .  Here, by the river,


s: She listened to the water slapping the wall,


s: And felt queer fascination in its blackness:


s: But it was cold, the little waves looked cruel,


s: The stars were keen, and a windy dash of spray


s: Struck her cheek, and withered her veins . . . And so


s: She dragged herself once more to home, and bed.


s: Paul hadn't guessed it yet--though twice, already,


s: She'd fainted--once, the first time, on the stage.


s: So she must tell him soon--or else--get out . . .


s: How could she say it?  That was the hideous thing.


s: She'd rather die than say it! . . . and all the trouble,


s: Months when she couldn't earn a cent, and then,


s: If he refused to marry her . . . well, what?


s: She saw him laughing, making a foolish joke,


s: His grey eyes turning quickly; and the words


s: Fled from her tongue . . .  She saw him sitting silent,


s: Brooding over his morning coffee, maybe,


s: And tried again . . . she bit her lips, and trembled,


s: And looked away, and said . . . 'Say Paul, boy,--listen--


s: There's something I must tell you . . . '  There she stopped,


s: Wondering what he'd say . . .  What would he say?


s: 'Spring it, kid!  Don't look so serious!'


s: 'But what I've got to say--IS--serious!'


s: Then she could see how, suddenly, he would sober,


s: His eyes would darken, he'd look so terrifying--


s: He always did--and what could she do but cry?


s: Perhaps, then, he would guess--perhaps he wouldn't.


s: And if he didn't, but asked her 'What's the matter?'--


s: She knew she'd never tell--just say she was sick . . .


s: And after that, when would she dare again?


s: And what would he do--even suppose she told him?


s: If it were Felix!  If it were only Felix!--


s: She wouldn't mind so much.  But as it was,


s: Bitterness choked her, she had half a mind


s: To pay out Felix for never having liked her,


s: By making people think that it was he . . .


s: She'd write a letter to someone, before she died,--


s: Just saying 'Felix did it--and wouldn't marry.'


s: And then she'd die . . .  But that was hard on Paul . . .


s: Paul would never forgive her--he'd never forgive her!


s: Sometimes she almost thought Paul really loved her . . .


s: She saw him look reproachfully at her coffin.


s: And then she closed her eyes and walked again


s: Those nightmare streets that she had walked so often:


s: She stood, and stared in through a drug-store window,


s: Watching a clerk wrap up a little pill-box.


s: But it was late.  No customers were there,--


s: Pitiless eyes would freeze her secret in her!


s: And then--what poison would she dare to ask for?


s: And if they asked her why, what would she say?


s: Two lovers, here at the corner, by the steeple,


s: Two lovers blow together like music blowing:


s: And the crowd dissolves about them like a sea.


s: Recurring waves of sound break vaguely about them,


s: They drift from wall to wall, from tree to tree.


s: 'Well, am I late?'  Upward they look and laugh,


s: They look at the great clock's golden hands,


s: They laugh and talk, not knowing what they say:


s: Only, their words like music seem to play;


s: And seeming to walk, they tread strange sarabands.


s: 'I brought you this . . . ' the soft words float like stars


s: The peach tree is in bloom, pink blossoms fall,


s: Water sings from an opened tap, the bees


s: Someone calls from the house.  She does not answer.


s: And dreamily smiles at the peach-tree leaves, wherethrough


s: The voice from the house fades far away,


s: The glistening leaves more vaguely ripple and sway . .


s: The tap is closed, the water ceases to hiss . . .


s: She turns to him and smiles . . . Sunlight above him


s: Gold is beaten before him, shrill bells of silver;


s: He is released of weight, his body is free,


s: Dark years like sinister tides coil under him . . .


s: The lazy sea-waves crumble along the beach


s: With a whirring sound like wind in bells,


s: He lies outstretched on the yellow wind-worn sands


s: Among the golden grains and sea-white shells . . .


s: 'One white rose . . . or is it pink, to-day?'


s: They pause and smile, not caring what they say,


s: The crowd flows past them like dividing waters.


s: Dreaming they stand, dreaming they walk.


s: 'Pink,--to-day!'--Face turns to dream-bright face,


s: Green leaves rise round them, sunshine settles upon them,


s: Water, in drops of silver, falls from the rose.


s: She smiles at a face that smiles through leaves from the mirror.


s: She breathes the fragrance; her dark eyes close . . .


s: Time is dissolved, it blows like a little dust:


s: Patters and passes, starring the window-pane.


s: She saw the lightning, with long blue quiver of light,


s: Ripping the darkness . . . and as she turned in terror


s: A soft face leaned above her, leaned softly down,


s: Softly around her a breath of roses was blown,


s: She sank in waves of quiet, she seemed to float


s: In a sea of silence . . . and soft steps grew remote . .


s: 'Well, let us walk in the park . . . The sun is warm,


s: We'll sit on a bench and talk . . .'  They turn and glide,


s: The crowd of faces wavers and breaks and flows.


s: 'Look how the oak-tops turn to gold in the sunlight!


s: Look how the tower is changed and glows!'


s: Two lovers move in the crowd like a link of music,


s: We press upon them, we hold them, and let them pass;


s: A chord of music strikes us and straight we tremble;


s: What was this dream we had, a dream of music,


s: Music that rose from the opening earth like magic


s: And shook its beauty upon us and died away?


s: The long cold streets extend once more before us.


s: Well,--it was two days after my husband died--


s: Two days!  And the earth still raw above him.


s: And I was sweeping the carpet in their hall.


s: In number four--the room with the red wall-paper--


s: Some chorus girls and men were singing that song


s: Round a box with silver handles'--and hearing them sing it


s: I started to cry.  Just then he came along


s: And stopped on the stairs and turned and looked at me,


s: And took the cigar from his mouth and sort of smiled


s: And said, 'Say, what's the matter?' and then came down


s: And touched my shoulder, and put his arm around me . . .


s: Thinking that it was raining, and a cold night,


s: With Jim so unaccustomed to being dead,--


s: That I was happy to have him sympathize,


s: To feel his arm, and leaned against him and cried.


s: And before I knew it, he got me into a room


s: Where a table was set, and no one there,


s: And sat me down on a sofa, and held me close,


s: And talked to me, telling me not to cry,


s: That it was all right, he'd look after me,--


s: But not to cry, my eyes were getting red,


s: Which didn't make me pretty.  And he was so nice,


s: That when he turned my face between his hands,


s: And looked at me, with those blue eyes of his,


s: Somehow I couldn't tell him not to do it,


s: Somehow I didn't mind, I let him kiss me,


s: And closed my eyes! . . . Well, that was how it started.


s: For when my heart was eased with crying, and grief


s: Had passed and left me quiet, somehow it seemed


s: As if it wasn't honest to change my mind,


s: To send him away, or say I hadn't meant it--


s: And, anyway, it seemed so hard to explain!


s: And so we sat and talked, not talking much,


s: But meaning as much in silence as in words,


s: There in that empty room with palms about us,


s: That private dining-room . . . And as we sat there


s: With unknown streets opening left and right,


s: New streets with farther lights, new taller houses,


s: Doors swinging into hallways filled with light,


s: Half-opened luminous windows, with white curtains


s: Streaming out in the night, and sudden music,--


s: And thinking of this, and through it half remembering


s: A quick and horrible death, my husband's eyes,


s: The broken-plastered walls, my boy asleep,--


s: It seemed as if my brain would break in two.


s: My voice began to tremble . . . and when I stood,


s: And told him I must go, and said good-night--


s: I couldn't see the end.  How would it end?


s: Would he return to-morrow?  Or would he not?


s: And did I want him to--or would I rather


s: Look for another job?--He took my shoulders


s: Between his hands, and looked down into my eyes,


s: And smiled, and said good-night.  If he had kissed me,


s: That would have--well, I don't know; but he didn't . .


s: And so I went downstairs, then, half elated,


s: Hoping to close the door before that party


s: In number four should sing that song again--


s: And my eyes were filled with tears.  And I was happy.


s: The days, the nights, flow one by one above us,


s: The hours go silently over our lifted faces,


s: We are like dreamers who walk beneath a sea.


s: Beneath high walls we flow in the sun together.


s: We sleep, we wake, we laugh, we pursue, we flee.


s: We sit at tables and sip our morning coffee,


s: We read the papers for tales of lust or crime.


s: The door swings shut behind the latest comer.


s: What have we done?  I close my eyes, remember


s: The great machine whose sinister brain before me


s: My hands have torn down walls, the stone and plaster.


s: I dropped great beams to the dusty street.


s: My eyes are worn with measuring cloths of purple,


s: And golden cloths, and wavering cloths, and pale.


s: I dream of a crowd of faces, white with menace.


s: Hands reach up to tear me.  My brain will fail.


s: Here, where the walls go down beneath our picks,


s: These walls whose windows gap against the sky,


s: Atom by atom of flesh and brain and marble


s: Will build a glittering tower before we die . . .


s: The young boy whistles, hurrying down the street,


s: One goes out to beauty, and does not know it.


s: 'Number four--the girl who died on the table--


s: The purpling body lies on the polished marble.


s: We open the throat, and lay the thyroid bare . . .


s: He heard the sharp breath quiver, and saw her breast


s: Her hands made futile gestures, she turned her head


s: Fighting for breath; her cheeks were flushed to scarlet,--


s: And all the dreams that hurried along her veins


s: Confusion ran among them, they whirled and clamored,


s: They fell, they rose, they struck, they shouted,


s: Till at last a pallor of silence hushed them all.


s: What was her name?  Where had she walked that morning?


s: Along what sunlit walls, what peopled street?


s: Backward he dreamed along a chain of days,


s: He saw her go her strange and secret ways,


s: She sat by a mirror, braiding her golden hair.


s: Her shadow ran before her along the street,


s: She bought a paper, held it to scan the headlines,


s: Smiled for a moment at sea-gulls high in sunlight,


s: Days passed, bright clouds of days.  Nights passed. And music


s: Murmured within the walls of lighted windows.


s: She lifted her face to the light and danced.


s: The dancers wreathed and grouped in moving patterns,


s: Her dress was purple, her slippers were golden,


s: Opened its golden heart on her breast . . .


s: She leaned to the surly languor of lazy music,


s: The violins were weaving a weft of silver,


s: The horns were weaving a lustrous brede of gold,


s: And time was caught in a glistening pattern,


s: Shadows of leaves fell over her face,--and sunlight:


s: Nearer she moved to a crouching darkness


s: Death, who at first had thought of her only an instant,


s: Smiled from a window upon her, and followed her slowly


s: Once, in her dreams, he spoke out clearly, crying,


s: I am the lover who keeps his appointment


s: She rose and stared at her own reflection,


s: The dark-eyed ghost, waiting beside her,


s: To lay pale hands upon her shoulders . . .


s: She combed her hair.  The sunlight glimmered


s: Death was a dream.  It could not change these eyes,


s: Blow out their light, or turn this mouth to dust.


s: She combed her hair and sang.  She would live forever.


s: Leaves flew past her window along a gust . . .


s: And graves were dug in the earth, and coffins passed,


s: And dreams went along her veins, and scattering clouds


s: Threw streaming shadows on walls and towers.


s: Snow falls.  The sky is grey, and sullenly glares


s: With purple lights in the canyoned street.


s: The fiery sign on the dark tower wreathes and flares . . .


s: The trodden grass in the park is covered with white,


s: The streets grow silent beneath our feet . . .


s: The city dreams, it forgets its past to-night.


s: And one, from his high bright window looking down


s: Over the enchanted whiteness of the town,


s: Seeing through whirls of white the vague grey towers,


s: Desires like this to forget what will not pass,


s: The littered papers, the dust, the tarnished grass,


s: Grey death, stale ugliness, and sodden hours.


s: Deep in his heart old bells are beaten again,


s: Dull echoes of hideous times and poisonous places.


s: He desires to drown in a cold white peace of snow.


s: He desires to forget a million faces . . .


s: In one room breathes a woman who dies of hunger.


s: The clock ticks slowly and stops.  And no one winds it.


s: In one room fade grey violets in a vase.


s: Snow flakes faintly hiss and melt on the window.


s: In one room, minute by minute, the flutist plays


s: The lamplit page of music, the tireless scales.


s: His hands are trembling, his short breath fails.


s: In one room, silently, lover looks upon lover,


s: The drunkard swears and touches the harlot's heartstrings


s: And one goes late in the streets, and thinks of murder;


s: And one lies staring, and thinks of death.


s: And one, who has suffered, clenches her hands despairing,


s: Who are all these, who flow in the veins of the city,


s: Some mount up to the brain and flower in fire.


s: Some are destroyed; some die; some slowly stream.


s: And the new are born who desire to destroy the old;


s: And fires are kindled and quenched; and dreams are broken,


s: And the slow night whirls in snow over towers of dreamers,


s: And along black streets that glisten as if with rain,


s: Like one in a restless sleep, who lies and dreams


s: Of vague desires, and memories, and half-forgotten pain . . .


s: Along dark veins, like lights the quick dreams run,


s: To mingle and glow at last in the enormous brain


s: A dream dissolves these insubstantial walls,--


s: A myriad secretly gliding lights lie bare . . .


s: The lovers rise, the harlot combs her hair,


s: The dead man's face grows blue in the dizzy lamplight,


s: The bank defaulter leers at a chaos of figures,


s: And runs among them, and is beaten down;


s: The sick man coughs and hears the chisels ringing;


s: Sees the enormous crowd, a million faces,


s: Ready to laugh, and seize, and crush and tear . . .


s: Laces her golden slippers, and runs through the door


s: Hearing swift music like an enchantment rise,


s: The walls grow luminous and warm, the walls


s: Tremble and glow with the lives within them moving,


s: Moving like music, secret and rich and warm.


s: How shall we live tonight?  Where shall we turn?


s: A thousand winding stairs lead down before us;


s: By lamplit flowered walls, long balustrades,


s: Through half-lit halls which reach no end.


s: You read--what is it, then that you are reading?


s: What music moves so silently in your mind?


s: I watch you from my window, unsuspected:


s: You move in an alien land, a silent age . . .


s: . . .  The poet--what was his name--?  Tokkei--Tokkei--


s: The poet walked alone in a cold late rain,


s: And thought his grief was like the crying of sea-birds;


s: For his lover was dead, he never would love again.


s: Rain in the dreams of the mind--rain forever--


s: Rain in the sky of the heart--rain in the willows--


s: But then he saw this face, this face like flame,


s: This quiet lady, this portrait by Hiroshigi;


s: And took it home with him; and with it came


s: What unexpected changes, subtle as weather!


s: Grew faintly fragrant, stirred with a stir of April,


s: And smoke of incense whirled about this portrait,


s: So young, so quietly smiling, with calm hands,


s: And smile, and lean from the picture, or say one word,


s: Which seemed to rise like light between her eyelids . .


s: And smiled for shame, and drank a cup of wine,


s: And held a candle, and searched her face


s: Through all the little shadows, to see what secret


s: Was it the quiet mouth, restrained a little?


s: The jade ring on her wrist, still almost swinging? . . .


s: He chose his favorite pen and drew these verses,


s: A dream came into his heart, his lover entered,


s: And in the morning, waking, he remembered,


s: Why did his darkened lover rise from the garden?


s: As if a someone hidden smiled and watched him . . .


s: Until he saw those young eyes, quietly smiling,


s: And could have sworn her cheek had turned--a little . . .


s: Sunlight dozed on the floor . . . He sat and wondered,


s: And that day, and for many days thereafter,


s: Or if she lived, no matter in what country,


s: By what far river or hill or lonely sea,


s: He would look in every face until he found her . . .


s: And before her quiet face he burned soft incense,


s: Boughs of the peach, or almond, or snow-white cherry,


s: That silent lady, young, and quietly smiling,


s: And sometimes, seeing this, he started to tremble,


s: To lay his palm along her hand, touch faintly


s: The ghostly smile that seemed to hover and vanish


s: Leered at his dreams, for he knew that Hiroshigi


s: And the lady, too, was dead, and all who knew her . .


s: The thin moon waxed and waned, and left him paler,


s: And he would surely have died; but there one day


s: Stared at the portrait, and said, 'This Hiroshigi


s: Cunningly drew the body, and called the spirit,


s: Sometimes, at death, it entered the portrait wholly . .


s: And she you love may come to you when you call her . . . '


s: Ran in the sun, bought wine of a hundred merchants,


s: Entered the darkening room, and faced the portrait,


s: Gleaming and young in the dusk, and held the wine-cup,


s: And said, aloud, 'Lo-san, will you drink this wine?'


s: And at the third the faint blue smoke of incense


s: The quiet lady came slowly down from the portrait,


s: And lifted her young white hands and took the wine cup;


s: 'Lo-san, will you stay forever?'--'Yes, I will stay.'--


s: 'When you are dead your spirit will find my spirit,


s: Music came down upon them, and spring returning,


s: And years went over the earth, and over the sea,


s: And lovers were born and spoke and died,


s: But forever in sunlight went these two immortal,


s: The lamplit page is turned, the dream forgotten;


s: The music changes tone, you wake, remember


s: Deep worlds you lived before,--deep worlds hereafter


s: Of leaf on falling leaf, music on music,


s: Rain and sorrow and wind and dust and laughter.


s: Helen was late and Miriam came too soon.


s: Joseph was dead, his wife and children starving.


s: Elaine was married and soon to have a child.


s: You dreamed last night of fiddler-crabs with fiddles;


s: They played a buzzing melody, and you smiled.


s: To-morrow--what?  And what of yesterday?


s: Through soundless labyrinths of dream you pass,


s: Through many doors to the one door of all.


s: Soon as it's opened we shall hear a music:


s: We walk with you.  Where is it that you lead us?


s: We climb the muffled stairs beneath high lanterns.


s: We descend again.  We grope through darkened cells.


s: You say: this darkness, here, will slowly kill me.


s: It creeps and weighs upon me . . . Is full of bells.


s: This is the thing remembered I would forget--


s: This windy gesture menaces me with death.


s: Fatigue! it says, and points its finger at me;


s: The torn certificate for my daughter's grave--


s: These are but mortal seconds in immortal time.


s: They brush me, fade away: like drops of water.


s: Let us retrace our steps: I have deceived you:


s: Nothing is here I could not frankly tell you:


s: No hint of guilt, or faithlessness, or threat.


s: Dreams--they are madness.  Staring eyes--illusion.


s: Let us return, hear music, and forget . . .


s: Of what she said to me that night--no matter.


s: My brain was full of music--something she played me--;


s: I couldn't remember it all, but phrases of it


s: Wreathed and wreathed among faint memories,


s: Seeking for something, trying to tell me something,


s: Urging to restlessness: verging on grief.


s: I tried to play the tune, from memory,--


s: But memory failed: the chords and discords climbed


s: And found no resolution--only hung there,


s: And left me morbid . . . Where, then, had I heard it? . . .


s: What secret dusty chamber was it hinting?


s: 'Dust', it said, 'dust . . . and dust . . . and sunlight . .


s: A cold clear April evening . . . snow, bedraggled,


s: Rain-worn snow, dappling the hideous grass . . .


s: And someone walking alone; and someone saying


s: That all must end, for the time had come to go . . . '


s: These were the phrases . . . but behind, beneath them


s: A greater shadow moved: and in this shadow


s: I stood and guessed . . . Was it the blue-eyed lady?


s: The one who always danced in golden slippers--


s: And had I danced with her,--upon this music?


s: Or was it further back--the unplumbed twilight


s: Of childhood?--No--much recenter than that.


s: You know, without my telling you, how sometimes


s: A word or name eludes you, and you seek it


s: Through running ghosts of shadow,--leaping at it,


s: Spreading faint snares for it of sense or sound:


s: Until, of a sudden, as if in a phantom forest,


s: You hear it, see it flash among the branches,


s: And scarcely knowing how, suddenly have it--


s: Well, it was so I followed down this music,


s: Glimpsing a face in darkness, hearing a cry,


s: Remembering days forgotten, moods exhausted,


s: Corners in sunlight, puddles reflecting stars--;


s: Until, of a sudden, and least of all suspected,


s: The thing resolved itself: and I remembered


s: Or was it nine?--no matter--call it nine--


s: A room in which the last of sunlight faded;


s: A vase of violets, fragrance in white curtains;


s: And, she who played the same thing later, playing.


s: She played this tune.  And in the middle of it


s: Abruptly broke it off, letting her hands


s: Fall in her lap.  She sat there so a moment,


s: With shoulders drooped, then lifted up a rose,


s: One great white rose, wide opened like a lotos,


s: And pressed it to her cheek, and closed her eyes.


s: 'You know--we've got to end this--Miriam loves you . . .


s: If she should ever know, or even guess it,--


s: What would she do?--Listen!--I'm not absurd . . .


s: I'm sure of it.  If you had eyes, for women--


s: To understand them--which you've never had--


s: You'd know it too . . . '  So went this colloquy,


s: Half humorous, with undertones of pathos,


s: Half grave, half flippant . . . while her fingers, softly,


s: Felt for this tune, played it and let it fall,


s: Now note by singing note, now chord by chord,


s: Repeating phrases with a kind of pleasure . . .


s: That she could neither break it--nor conclude?


s: It paused . . . and wandered . . . paused again; while she,


s: Perplexed and tired, half told me I must go,--


s: Half asked me if I thought I ought to go . . .


s: Well, April passed with many other evenings,


s: Evenings like this, with later suns and warmer,


s: With violets always there, and fragrant curtains . . .


s: And she was right: and Miriam found it out . . .


s: And after that, when eight deep years had passed--


s: Or nine--we met once more,--by accident . . .


s: She played this tune?--Or what, then, was intended? . . .


s: The cigarette-smoke loops and slides above us,


s: Dipping and swirling as the waiter passes;


s: You strike a match and stare upon the flame.


s: The tiny fire leaps in your eyes a moment,


s: And dwindles away as silently as it came.


s: This melody, you say, has certain voices--


s: They rise like nereids from a river, singing,


s: Lift white faces, and dive to darkness again.


s: Wherever you go you bear this river with you:


s: A leaf falls,--and it flows, and you have pain.


s: So says the tune to you--but what to me?


s: What to the waiter, as he pours your coffee,


s: The violinist who suavely draws his bow?


s: That man, who folds his paper, overhears it.


s: A thousand dreams revolve and fall and flow.


s: Some one there is who sees a virgin stepping


s: Down marble stairs to a deep tomb of roses:


s: At the last moment she lifts remembering eyes.


s: Green leaves blow down.  The place is checked with shadows.


s: A long-drawn murmur of rain goes down the skies.


s: And oaks are stripped and bare, and smoke with lightning:


s: And clouds are blown and torn upon high forests,


s: And then falls silence . . . And through long silence falls


s: 'Down endless stairs she goes, as once before.'


s: So says the tune to him--but what to me?


s: What shapes fantastic, terrible dreams? . . .


s: This is the house.  On one side there is darkness,


s: Into the darkness you may lift your lanterns--


s: And here are echoing stairs to lead you downward


s: And here is spring forever at these windows,


s: This is her room.  On one side there is music--


s: At one step she could move from love to silence,


s: And here are balconies from which she heard you,


s: And here the glass in which she saw your shadow


s: Here is the room--with ghostly walls dissolving--


s: The twilight room in which she called you 'lover';


s: And the floorless room in which she called you 'friend.'


s: So many times, in doubt, she ran between them!--


s: Through windy corridors of darkening end.


s: Here she could stand with one dim light above her


s: And hear far music, like a sea in caverns,


s: And here, in a roofless room where it was raining,


s: She bore the patient sorrow of rain alone.


s: Your words were walls which suddenly froze around her.


s: Your words were windows,--large enough for moonlight,


s: Your letters--fragrant cloisters faint with music.


s: The music that assuaged her there was you.


s: How many times she heard your step ascending


s: She heard them turn again, ring slowly fainter,


s: Why had you gone? . . .  The door, perhaps, mistaken . . .


s: You would go elsewhere.  The deep walls were shaken.


s: A certain rose-leaf--sent without intention--


s: Became, with time, a woven web of fire--


s: A certain hurried glance, let fall at parting,


s: Became, with time, the flashings of a storm.


s: Yet, there was nothing asked, no hint to tell you


s: Of secret idols carved in secret chambers


s: Nothing was done, until at last she knew you.


s: Nothing was known, till, somehow, she was dead.


s: How did she die?--You say, she died of poison.


s: Simple and swift.  And much to be regretted.


s: So many thousand times from light to darkness,


s: You did not see how many times she hurried


s: To lean from certain windows, vainly hoping,


s: Passionate still for beauty, remembered spring.


s: You did not know how long she clung to music,


s: Did she, then, make the choice, and step out bravely


s: From sound to silence--close, herself, those windows?


s: That darkness moved,--for once,--and so possessed her? . . .


s: We'll never know, you say, for she is dead.


s: You see that porcelain ranged there in the window--


s: Platters and soup-plates done with pale pink rosebuds,


s: See how the pattern clings to the gleaming edges!


s: They're works of art--minutely seen and felt,


s: Each petal done devoutly.  Is it failure


s: Study them . . . you will see there, in the porcelain,


s: If you stare hard enough, a sort of swimming


s: Of lights and shadows, ghosts within a crystal--


s: My brain unfolding!  There you'll see me sitting


s: Day after day, close to a certain window,


s: Looking down, sometimes, to see the people . . .


s: Sometimes my wife comes there to speak to me . . .


s: Sometimes the grey cat waves his tail around me . . .


s: Goldfish swim in a bowl, glisten in sunlight,


s: Dilate to a gorgeous size, blow delicate bubbles,


s: Drowse among dark green weeds.  On rainy days,


s: You'll see a gas-light shedding light behind me--


s: An eye-shade round my forehead.  There I sit,


s: Twirling the tiny brushes in my paint-cups,


s: Painting the pale pink rosebuds, minute violets,


s: Exquisite wreaths of dark green ivy leaves.


s: On this leaf, goes a dream I dreamed last night


s: Of two soft-patterned toads--I thought them stones,


s: Until they hopped!  And then a great black spider,--


s: It crossed the room in one tremendous leap.


s: Here,--as I coil the stems between two leaves,--


s: I cried the secret between two universes . . .


s: A friend of mine took hasheesh once, and said


s: Just as he fell asleep he had a dream,--


s: And felt, or saw, or knew himself a part


s: Of marvelous slowly-wreathing intricate patterns,


s: Plane upon plane, depth upon coiling depth,


s: Voluted grasses, twists and curves and spirals--


s: All of it darkly moving . . . as for me,


s: I need no hasheesh for it--it's too easy!


s: Soon as I shut my eyes I set out walking


s: In a monstrous jungle of monstrous pale pink roseleaves,


s: Violets purple as death, dripping with water,


s: And ivy-leaves as big as clouds above me.


s: Here, in a simple pattern of separate violets--


s: With scalloped edges gilded--here you have me


s: Thinking of something else.  My wife, you know,--


s: There's something lacking--force, or will, or passion,


s: I don't know what it is--and so, sometimes,


s: When I am tired, or haven't slept three nights,


s: Or it is cloudy, with low threat of rain,


s: Ruffling their leaves--and I begin to think


s: And that delicious night.  Where is she now?


s: I meant to write--but she has moved, by this time,


s: And then, besides, she might find out I'm married.


s: Well, there is more--I'm getting old and timid--


s: The years have gnawed my will.  I've lost my nerve!


s: I never strike out boldly as I used to--


s: But sit here, painting violets, and remember


s: That thrilling night.  Photographers, she said,


s: Asked her to pose for them; her eyes and forehead,--


s: Dark brown eyes, and a smooth and pallid forehead,--


s: Were thought so beautiful.--And so they were.


s: Pauline . . .  These violets are like words remembered . . .


s: Here, in these leaves.  I stopped my work to tell it,


s: And then, when I had finished, went on thinking:


s: A man I saw on a train . . .  I was still a boy . . .


s: Who killed himself by diving against a wall.


s: When she was still my sweetheart, years ago.


s: It's funny how things change,--just change, by growing,


s: Without an effort . . .  And here are trivial things,--


s: A chill, an errand forgotten, a cut while shaving;


s: A friend of mine who tells me he is married . . .


s: Or is that last so trivial?  Well, no matter!


s: This is the sort of thing you'll see of me,


s: If you look hard enough.  This, in its way,


s: Is a kind of fame.  My life arranged before you


s: In scrolls of leaves, rosebuds, violets, ivy,


s: Clustered or wreathed on plate and cup and platter . . .


s: Sometimes, I say, I'm just like John the Baptist--


s: You have my head before you . . . on a platter.


s: Wind blows.  Snow falls.  The great clock in its tower


s: Ticks with reverberant coil and tolls the hour:


s: At the deep sudden stroke the pigeons fly . . .


s: The fine snow flutes the cracks between the flagstones.


s: We close our coats, and hurry, and search the sky.


s: We are like music, each voice of it pursuing


s: A golden separate dream, remote, persistent,


s: Climbing to fire, receding to hoarse despair.


s: What do you whisper, brother?  What do you tell me? . . .


s: We pass each other, are lost, and do not care.


s: One mounts up to beauty, serenely singing,


s: Forgetful of the steps that cry behind him;


s: One drifts slowly down from a waking dream.


s: One, foreseeing, lingers forever unmoving . . .


s: Upward and downward, past him there, we stream.


s: One has death in his eyes: and walks more slowly.


s: Death, among jonquils, told him a freezing secret.


s: A cloud blows over his eyes, he ponders earth.


s: He sees in the world a forest of sunlit jonquils:


s: A slow black poison huddles beneath that mirth.


s: Death, from street to alley, from door to window,


s: Cries out his news,--of unplumbed worlds approaching,


s: Of a cloud of darkness soon to destroy the tower.


s: But why comes death,--he asks,--in a world so perfect?


s: Or why the minute's grey in the golden hour?


s: Music, a sudden glissando, sinister, troubled,


s: A drift of wind-torn petals, before him passes


s: The bodies of old and young, of maimed and lovely,


s: Are slowly borne to earth, with a dirge of cries.


s: Down cobbled streets they come; down huddled stairways;


s: Through silent halls; through carven golden doorways;


s: The curtains are closed across deserted windows.


s: Earth streams out of the shovel; the pebbles knock.


s: Mary, whose hands rejoiced to move in sunlight;


s: Silent Elaine; grave Anne, who sang so clearly;


s: Fugitive Helen, who loved and walked alone;


s: Miriam too soon dead, darkly remembered;


s: Childless Ruth, who sorrowed, but could not atone;


s: Jean, whose laughter flashed over depths of terror,


s: And Eloise, who desired to love but dared not;


s: Doris, who turned alone to the dark and cried,--


s: They are blown away like windflung chords of music,


s: They drift away; the sudden music has died.


s: And one, with death in his eyes, comes walking slowly


s: And sees the shadow of death in many faces,


s: He desires immortal music and spring forever,


s: We sit together and talk, or smoke in silence.


s: You say (but use no words) 'this night is passing


s: As other nights when we are dead will pass . . .'


s: Perhaps I misconstrue you: you mean only,


s: 'How deathly pale my face looks in that glass . . .'


s: You say: 'We sit and talk, of things important . . .


s: How many others like ourselves, this instant,


s: Mark the pendulum swinging against the wall?


s: How many others, laughing, sip their coffee--


s: Or stare at mirrors, and do not talk at all? . . .


s: 'This is the moment' (so you would say, in silence)


s: When suddenly we have had too much of laughter:


s: And a freezing stillness falls, no word to say.


s: Our mouths feel foolish . . .  For all the days hereafter


s: What have we saved--what news, what tune, what play?


s: 'We see each other as vain and futile tricksters,--


s: Posturing like bald apes before a mirror;


s: How many others, like ourselves, this instant,


s: See how the great world wizens, and are wise? . . .'


s: And even those most like angels creep for schemes.


s: The one you love leans forward, smiles, deceives you,


s: Opens a door through which you see dark dreams.


s: But this is momentary . . . or else, enduring,


s: Leads you with devious eyes through mists and poisons


s: To horrible chaos, or suicide, or crime . . .


s: And all these others who at your conjuration


s: Grow pale, feeling the skeleton touch of time,--


s: Or, laughing sadly, talk of things important,


s: Or stare at mirrors, startled to see their faces,


s: Or drown in the waveless vacuum of their days,--


s: Suddenly, as from sleep, awake, forgetting


s: This nauseous dream; take up their accustomed ways,


s: Exhume the ghost of a joke, renew loud laughter,


s: Forget the moles above their sweethearts' eyebrows,


s: And dance once more in a rose-festooned illusion


s: They say (as we ourselves have said, remember)


s: 'What wizardry this slow waltz works upon us!


s: And how it brings to mind forgotten things!'


s: They say 'How strange it is that one such evening


s: Can wake vague memories of so many springs!'


s: And so they go . . .  In a thousand crowded places,


s: They sit to smile and talk, or rise to ragtime,


s: And, for their pleasures, agree or disagree.


s: With secret symbols they play on secret passions.


s: The innocent word that sets remembrance trembling,


s: The dubious word that sets the scared heart beating . . .


s: Shakes down seconds . . .  They laugh at time, dissembling;


s: Or coil for a victim and do not talk at all.


s: From time to time, lifting his eyes, he sees


s: The soft blue starlight through the one small window,


s: The moon above black trees, and clouds, and Venus,--


s: And turns to write . . .  The clock, behind ticks softly.


s: It is so long, indeed, since I have written,--


s: Two years, almost, your last is turning yellow,--


s: That these first words I write seem cold and strange.


s: Are you the man I knew, or have you altered?


s: Altered, of course--just as I too have altered--


s: And whether towards each other, or more apart,


s: We cannot say . . .  I've just re-read your letter--


s: Not through forgetfulness, but more for pleasure--


s: Of mystic consciousness--divine conversion--


s: The sense of oneness with the infinite,--


s: Faith in the world, its beauty, and its purpose . . .


s: Well, you believe one must have faith, in some sort,


s: If one's to talk through this dark world contented.


s: But is the world so dark?  Or is it rather


s: Our own brute minds,--in which we hurry, trembling,


s: Through streets as yet unlighted?  This, I think.


s: You have been always, let me say, "romantic,"--


s: Eager for color, for beauty, soon discontented


s: With a world of dust and stones and flesh too ailing:


s: Even before the question grew to problem


s: And drove you bickering into metaphysics,


s: You met on lower planes the same great dragon,


s: Seeking release, some fleeting satisfaction,


s: In strange aesthetics . . .  You tried, as I remember,


s: One after one, strange cults, and some, too, morbid,


s: The cruder first, more violent sensations,


s: Gorgeously carnal things, conceived and acted


s: With splendid animal thirst . . .  Then, by degrees,--


s: In all that hue and tone may play on flesh,


s: Or thought on brain,--you passed, if I may say so,


s: From red and scarlet through morbid greens to mauve.


s: Let us regard ourselves, you used to say,


s: As instruments of music, whereon our lives


s: Will play as we desire: and let us yield


s: These subtle bodies and subtler brains and nerves


s: To all experience plays . . . And so you went


s: From subtle tune to subtler, each heard once,


s: Twice or thrice at the most, tiring of each;


s: And closing one by one your doors, drew in


s: Slowly, through darkening labyrinths of feeling,


s: Towards the central chamber . . .  Which now you've reached.


s: What, then's, the secret of this ultimate chamber--


s: Or innermost, rather?  If I see it clearly


s: Of one who has found this world of dust and flesh,--


s: This world of lamentations, death, injustice,


s: Bareness, and ugliness, and iteration,--


s: Too meaningless; or, if it has a meaning,


s: Too tiresomely insistent on one meaning:


s: Futility . . .  This world, I hear you saying,--


s: With lifted chin, and arm in outflung gesture,


s: Coldly imperious,--this transient world,


s: What has it then to give, if not containing


s: Deep hints of nobler worlds?  We know its beauties,--


s: Momentary and trivial for the most part,


s: Perceived through flesh, passing like flesh away,--


s: And know how much outweighed they are by darkness.


s: We are like searchers in a house of darkness,


s: A house of dust; we creep with little lanterns,


s: Throwing our tremulous arcs of light at random,


s: Now here, now there, seeing a plane, an angle,


s: An edge, a curve, a wall, a broken stairway


s: Leading to who knows what; but never seeing


s: The whole at once . . .  We grope our way a little,


s: And then grow tired.  No matter what we touch,


s: Dust is the answer--dust: dust everywhere.


s: If this were all--what were the use, you ask?


s: But this is not: for why should we be seeking,


s: Why should we bring this need to seek for beauty,


s: To lift our minds, if there were only dust?


s: This is the central chamber you have come to:


s: Turning your back to the world, until you came


s: To this deep room, and looked through rose-stained windows,


s: And saw the hues of the world so sweetly changed.


s: At the very last we all put faith in something,--


s: You in this ghost that animates your world,


s: This ethical ghost,--and I, you'll say, in reason,--


s: Or sensuous beauty,--or in my secret self . . .


s: Though as for that you put your faith in these,


s: As much as I do--and then, forsaking reason,--


s: Ascending, you would say, to intuition,--


s: You predicate this ghost of yours, as well.


s: Of course, you might have argued,--and you should have,--


s: Could shape our world without entailing purpose:


s: Without conceiving mind? . . .  We are like children


s: Strange patterns drawn,--circles, arcs, ellipses,


s: Moulded in sand . . .  Who put them there, we wonder?


s: Did someone draw them here before we came?


s: Or was it just the sea?--We pore upon them,


s: And if these perfect shapes are evidence


s: Of immanent mind, it is but circumstantial:


s: He never troubles us.  He stands aloof--


s: Well, if he stands at all: is not concerned


s: With what we are or do.  You, if you like,


s: May think he broods upon us, loves us, hates us,


s: Conceives some purpose of us.  In so doing


s: You see, without much reason, will in law.


s: I am content to say, 'this world is ordered,


s: Of natural things.'  Who makes the more assumption?


s: If we were wise--which God knows we are not--


s: (Notice I call on God!) we'd plumb this riddle


s: Not in the world we see, but in ourselves.


s: These brains of ours--these delicate spinal clusters--


s: Have limits: why not learn them, learn their cravings?


s: Which of the two minds, yours or mine, is sound?


s: Yours, which scorned the world that gave it freedom,


s: Until you managed to see that world as omen,--


s: Or mine, which likes the world, takes all for granted,


s: Sorrow as much as joy, and death as life?--


s: You lean on dreams, and take more credit for it.


s: I stand alone . . .  Well, I take credit, too.


s: You find your pleasure in being at one with all things--


s: Fusing in lambent dream, rising and falling


s: As all things rise and fall . . .  I do that too--


s: With reservations.  I find more varied pleasure


s: In understanding: and so find beauty even


s: In this strange dream of yours you call the truth.


s: Well, I have bored you.  And it's growing late.


s: For household news--what have you heard, I wonder?


s: You must have heard that Paul was dead, by this time--


s: Of spinal cancer.  Nothing could be done--


s: We found it out too late.  His death has changed me,


s: Deflected much of me that lived as he lived,


s: Saddened me, slowed me down.  Such things will happen,


s: Life is composed of them; and it seems wisdom


s: To see them clearly, meditate upon them,


s: And understand what things flow out of them.


s: Otherwise, all goes on here much as always.


s: Why won't you come and see us, in the spring,


s: And bring old times with you?--If you could see me


s: Sitting here by the window, watching Venus


s: Go down behind my neighbor's poplar branches,--


s: Just where you used to sit,--I'm sure you'd come.


s: This year, they say, the springtime will be early.


s: What shall we talk of?  Li Po?  Hokusai?


s: You narrow your long dark eyes to fascinate me;


s: You smile a little. . . . Outside, the night goes by.


s: I walk alone in a forest of ghostly trees . . .


s: Your pale hands rest palm downwards on your knees.


s: 'These lines--converging, they suggest such distance!


s: The soul is drawn away, beyond horizons.


s: Lured out to what?  One dares not think.


s: Sometimes, I glimpse these infinite perspectives


s: In intimate talk (with such as you) and shrink . . .


s: 'One feels so petty!--One feels such--emptiness!--'


s: You mimic horror, let fall your lifted hand,


s: And smile at me; with brooding tenderness . . .


s: Alone on darkened waters I fall and rise;


s: Slow waves above me break, faint waves of cries.


s: 'And then these colors . . . but who would dare describe them?


s: This faint rose-coral pink . . this green--pistachio?--


s: So insubstantial!  Like the dim ghostly things


s: Two lovers find in love's still-twilight chambers . . .


s: Old peacock-fans, and fragrant silks, and rings . . .


s: 'Rings, let us say, drawn from the hapless fingers


s: Of some great lady, many centuries nameless,--


s: Or is that too sepulchral?--dulled with dust;


s: And necklaces that crumble if you touch them;


s: And gold brocades that, breathed on, fall to rust.


s: 'No--I am wrong . . . it is not these I sought for--!


s: Why did they come to mind?  You understand me--


s: You know these strange vagaries of the brain!--'


s: --I walk alone in a forest of ghostly trees;


s: Your pale hands rest palm downwards on your knees;


s: These strange vagaries of yours are all too plain.


s: 'But why perplex ourselves with tedious problems


s: Of art or . . . such things? . . . while we sit here, living,


s: With all that's in our secret hearts to say!--'


s: Hearts?--Your pale hand softly strokes the satin.


s: You play deep music--know well what you play.


s: You stroke the satin with thrilling of finger-tips,


s: Brushing our dreams with soft and shadowy words . .


s: We know your words are foolish, yet sit here bound


s: 'How beautiful is intimate talk like this!--


s: It is as if we dissolved grey walls between us,


s: Stepped through the solid portals, become but shadows,


s: To hear a hidden music . . . Our own vast shadows


s: Lean to a giant size on the windy walls,


s: Or dwindle away; we hear our soft footfalls


s: Music sings far off, flows suddenly near,


s: We walk through subterranean caves again,--


s: A shadowy weight of frescos on the ceiling,


s: Soundless grotesques with writhing claws and wings . . .


s: And here a beautiful face looks down upon us;


s: And someone hurries before, unseen, and sings . . .


s: Have we seen all, I wonder, in these chambers--


s: Or is there yet some gorgeous vault, arched low,


s: Where sleeps an amazing beauty we do not know? . . '


s: The question falls: we walk in silence together,


s: Thinking of that deep vault and of its secret . . .


s: Are suddenly blown away in a whistling darkness.


s: Deep walls crash down in the whirlwind of desire.


s: And the cold clear dark of starlight fell,


s: He heard in his blood the well-known bell


s: Falling down with an anguished cry . . .


s: Something is marked, this night, for death . . .


s: Clapping of hands, and thudding of drums,


s: To-night, he thought, I shall die again,


s: With the placid gaze of fed desire . . .


s: He walked; and behind the whisper of trees,


s: She parted the branches and peered at him,


s: Through lowered lids her two eyes burned,


s: Moving her white knees as he moved . . .


s: In the starlight dance of horns and drums . . .


s: The walls and roofs, the scarlet towers,


s: This air is alive with witches: the white witch rides


s: In the clear darkness, while the moon hides,


s: They come like dreams, like something remembered . .


s: Forget these things that trouble your eyes,


s: Lighter than smoke we wreathe and rise . . .


s: The cold air hisses between us . . . Beloved, beloved,


s: Something about clear music that sang through water . . .


s: I cannot remember.  The storm-drops break on the leaves.


s: Something was lost in the darkness.  Someone is dead.


s: Look how the branches are tossed in this air,


s: Black clouds rush to devour the stars in the sky,


s: The moon stares down like a half-closed eye.


s: The leaves are scattered, the birds are blown,


s: We run from our windy shadows; we are running alone.


s: Like a thing of smoke it crossed the sky,


s: The witch! he said.  And he heard a cry,


s: The earth has veins: they throb to-night,


s: The tips of the trees grow red and bright,


s: The leaves are swollen, I feel them beat,


s: They press together, they push and sigh,


s: The great red bat with the woman's face . . .


s: Crushed the live leaves, reached out white hands


s: The priests with claws, the lovers with hooves,


s: I am here! she said.  The bough he broke--


s: I am here! she said.  The white thigh gleamed


s: The head thrown backward as he had dreamed,


s: And the lifted hands, and the virgin breasts,


s: I am here! she cried.  He answered 'Stay!'


s: Of terrible hooves on the hollow ground;


s: They rushed, were still; a silence fell;


s: Look beloved!  Why do you hide your face?


s: Look, in the centre there, above the fire,


s: They are bearing the boy who blasphemed love!


s: They are playing a piercing music upon him


s: She leans above the beautiful anguished body,


s: And draws slow music from those strings.


s: They dance around him, they fling red roses upon him,


s: Their feet grow dark with his blood, they beat and


s: They dance upon him, until he cries no more . . .


s: Beneath green clouds, in a copper sky . . .


s: They have quenched the fires, they dance in the darkness,


s: The satyrs have run among them to seize and tear,


s: She screams and falls, he bears her away with him,


s: And the night grows full of whistling wings.


s: In the calm evening bright with stars. . . .'


s: Where have I heard these words?  Was it you who sang them?


s: Let us hurry, beloved! the hard hooves trample;


s: She drops through the fragrant night, and clings


s: Fast in the shadow, with hands like claws,


s: With soft eyes closed and mouth that feeds,


s: To the young white flesh that warmly bleeds.


s: From lifting throats, a soft-sung praise;


s: Their knees and breasts are white and bare,


s: They have hung pale roses in their hair,


s: See how the white youth struggles in vain!


s: The weak arms writhe in a soundless pain;


s: But still she whispers upon him and clings. . . .


s: See how quiet the white one lies! . . . .


s: Wind through the trees. . . . and a voice is heard


s: Singing far off.  The dead leaves fall. . . .


s: And lay on the stones and gave my flesh,


s: Dead leaves stream through the hurrying air


s: The priests with hooves, the lovers with horns,


s: They draw their knives on the spurting throats,


s: They smear the column with blood of goats,


s: And wait like stones for the moon's eclipse.


s: They stand like stones and stare at the sky


s: Where the moon leers down like a half-closed eye. . .


s: That filled their shadowy yesterdays. . . .


s: Where are the breasts, the scarlet wings? . . . .


s: They gaze at each other with troubled gaze. . . .


s: And then, as the shadow closes the moon,


s: Shout, and strike with their hooves the ground,


s: And rush through the dark, and fill the night


s: There, where the great walls crowd the stars,


s: In a grove of twisted leafless trees. . . .


s: These three, the one of whom stands upright,


s: While one lies weeping and one of them crawls?


s: The face that he turned was a wounded face,


s: I heard the dripping of blood on stones. . . .


s: Hooves had trampled and torn this place,


s: And the leaves were strewn with blood and bones.


s: The warm earth stretches herself and sighs. . . .


s: Listen!  I heard the slow heart beat. . . .


s: I will lie on this grass as a lover lies


s: And reach to the north and reach to the south


s: Beloved, beloved, where the slow waves of the wind


s: Under the hurrying stars, under the heaving arches,


s: Like one whirled down under shadowy seas,


s: Where are you?  Where are you?  It is I.  It is I.


s: It is your eyes I seek, it is your windy hair,


s: Your starlight body that breathes in the darkness there.


s: Under the darkness I feel you stirring. . . .


s: And this soft mouth that darkly meets my mouth,


s: Darkness, and wind in the tortured trees;


s: Dance till you fall!  Lift your torches!


s: Until your eyes are stretched with pain;


s: I will break your body and fling it away. . . .


s: Look, you are trembling. . . . Lie still, beloved!


s: Is it your heart I hear beneath me. . . .


s: The voices are still that cried around us. . . .


s: The woods grow still for the sacred hour.


s: The grey trees lean to the east in fear.


s: 'By the clear waters where once I died . . . .'


s: Beloved, whose voice was this that cried?


s: By the clear waves that starward run. . . .


s: And crumbled in flame that should have annealed. . .


s: Silence. . . . the red leaves, one by one,


s: The veins of the red earth swell and beat.


s: The dead leaves sigh on the troubled air,


s: Far off the maenads bind their hair. . . .


s: The fire is drawn from the heart of the moon.


s: The great bell cracks and falls at last.


s: The moon whirls out.  The sky grows still.


s: Look, how the white cloud crosses the stars


s: No sign of the things we saw this night.


s: A song you have heard, you think, in dream:


s: In the dark forest where maenads scream . . .


s: 'By the clear waters where once I died . . .


s: In the calm evening bright with stars . . . '


s: What do the strange words mean? you say,--


s: The half-shut doors through which we heard that music


s: Are softly closed.  Horns mutter down to silence.


s: The stars whirl out, the night grows deep.


s: Darkness settles upon us.  A vague refrain


s: In numberless rooms we stretch ourselves and sleep.


s: Where have we been?  What savage chaos of music


s: Whirls in our dreams?--We suddenly rise in darkness,


s: Open our eyes, cry out, and sleep once more.


s: We dream we are numberless sea-waves languidly foaming


s: Or clouds blown windily over a sky at midnight,


s: Or chords of music scattered in hurrying darkness,


s: We open our eyes and stare at the coiling darkness,


s: 'This envelope you say has something in it


s: Which once belonged to your dead son--or something


s: He knew, was fond of?  Something he remembers?--


s: The soul flies far, and we can only call it


s: By things like these . . . a photograph, a letter,


s: . . .  Wind flows softly, the long slow even wind,


s: Wind blows, bearing cold clouds over the ocean,


s: Streaming one by one over trees and towers,


s: Wind flows, bearing clouds; the hurrying shadows


s: ' . . . A spirit darkens before me . . . it is the spirit


s: Which in the flesh you called your son . . . A spirit


s: He says that he is happy, is much honored;


s: Forgives and is forgiven . . . rain and wind


s: Do not perplex him . . . storm and dust forgotten . .


s: The glittering wheels in wheels of time are broken


s: 'He is unhappy.  This thing, he says, transcends you:


s: Dust cannot hold what shines beyond the dust . . .


s: What seems calamity is less than a sigh;


s: 'He tells you she is there, and loves him still,--


s: Not as she did, but as all spirits love . . .


s: A cloud of spirits has gathered about him.


s: They praise him and call him, they do him honor;


s: He is more beautiful, he shines upon them.'


s: . . .  Wind flows softly, the long deep tremulous wind,


s: Over the low roofs white with snow . . .


s: Wind flows, bearing dreams; they gather and vanish,


s: Over the outstretched lands of days remembered,


s: One by one they gather and talk in the darkness,


s: He will not hear me: I have lost my power.'


s: 'Three times I've asked him!  He will never tell me.


s: God have mercy upon him.  I will ask no more.'


s: The door is shut.  She leaves the curtained office,


s: And down the grey-walled stairs comes trembling slowly


s: Her withered hand clings tightly to the railing.


s: The long stairs rise and fall beneath her feet.


s: Here in the brilliant sun we jostle, waiting


s: To tear her secret out . . . We laugh, we hurry,


s: We go our way, revolving, sinister, slow.


s: She blinks in the sun, and then steps faintly downward.


s: We whirl her away, we shout, we spin, we flow.